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Dildometer 

A scientific instrument used to measeure dildons. Dildon is a derived term, like Newton, to represent dildoes per square foot.
Mr T: Whoa, I'm picking up 34 Dildons on my TI Super Dildometer!
Chuck Norris: Someone has alot of dildoes around here!!!
Your Mom: Oh, that's just me. ;-)
Dildometer by Shouter January 8, 2008
Related Words

dickometer 

"I stuck my dickometer in that bitch to see how hot she was."
dickometer by angusvox April 26, 2009

dickmometer 

Taking your girlfriends temperature by sticking your dick in her mouth.
Girl: Babe, I don't feel good. Do I feel hot to you?

Boy: Oh no, let me take your dickmometer. You will be feeling better in no time.
dickmometer by Sneakinsally816 September 30, 2014
The ability to spot a lesbian. The same as gaydar but for lesbians.
Oh my God! I knew she was a lesbian! My dikometer so picked that up!
dikometer by vntrusso March 12, 2008

dildometer 

An abstract tool for measuring acts of douchitude on a subjective scale.
The "editors" of urbandictionary often break the dildometer scale when they reject my definitions for no good reason...including this one.
dildometer by BigEz April 8, 2010

Dildometer 

The dildometer is a device used to measure the velocity of any given dildo. i.e. the speed of a dildos movement when inserted into an orifice of the users choice.
Tom: What were your new dildo's ratings on the dildometer??
Jessica: My dildo was off the charts!! The dildometer read out the dildocity at an astonishing 100 dildons!
Tom: Wow! You gotta let me borrow that!
Dildometer by butt chug January 2, 2016