A middle-aged female,typically from a small town in the
American south or midwest,who is very old-fashioned yet wears more red lipstick &
blue eyeshadow than a hooker,can't make a decision without a man,talks so slow that you'd have time to take a nap before they even finish one sentence,carries a huge purse nearly as big as their husband's '71 Oldsmobile,spends hours in a local 'mom-&-pop'
beauty shop having their hair teased about 9" high,gossips constantly and over-uses phrases like "oh,dear!","I swear!",and "I do declare!",uses enough Aqua Net hairspray to destroy the ozone layer,and is usually married to a Dead Elvis whom she met in high
school back in '59.(see Dead Elvis)