waffle-iron 

Someone who supposedly is a brave/strong person with "nerves and/or abs of steel", but who in reality totally wimps out and merely makes vague and indefinite remarks/excuses (i.e., "waffles") whenever a situation arises for him to actually assist/defend/protect someone or do anything else of any real use/effectiveness, especially in cases where his acting/intervening would risk offending others who are "important" to either him or others close to him.

Frustrated child: Anytime my parents are away, I'm always told to ask my Uncle John anytime I need help/advice with anything or to settle any disputes I may have with others, but he usually either claims to be too tired/busy or just smiles amusedly at my tearful complaining tirades and pretends not to understand what my problem is. What a waffle-iron!

waffle-iron by QuacksO June 14, 2018

Waffle Iron 

The act of dropping a deuce upon somebodies laptop keyboard then closing it to smoosh all the poo around. When that sombody decides to write his term paper later that night, he's in for a stinky, sticky surprise. It's great for any occasion.

You cut that shit out, or I'll give your laptop a good ol' waffle iron.

Waffle Iron by Mike Lewis April 22, 2005

waffle iron 

The act of ejaculating into any fleshy fold

Brian: “Hey, girl! How was your date last night?”
Ross: “Well, dinner was dreadful and the conversation was dreary, but as I’m sure you already know, a batter queen like me is always satisfied when a date ends with a waffle iron.”

waffle iron by Dignity's Foe March 28, 2012

waffle iron 

The waffle iron, simply put, is taking a dump on a persons chest, picking up a tennis raquet, and smacking the poo from the top with the raquet. Thus, creating a "waffle iron" effect on the feces.

while he was passed out, instead of writing on mike, we decided to give him a waffle iron.

waffle iron by CFP July 24, 2008

Waffle Iron 

A terrible practical joke or rude method of taking revenge. The attacker defecates on the offender's laptop keyboard, then shuts the lid tightly, thus smashing the feces into the keys. The feces take on the shape of the keys, like a waffle.

"You won't believe this. Someone gave my laptop a Waffle Iron last night after the party."

Waffle Iron by ProgressiveMexican November 12, 2009

Waffle Iron 

When you poop in someone's laptop and then close it

I just gave the teacher a waffle iron. That'll teach that bitch not to give me detention!

Waffle Iron by Epic Butters 69 September 7, 2019

waffle iron 

A "Waffle Iron" is when you bang a girl from behind, while holding her face into a chain-link fence. You hold her face (firmly) against the fence until after you've blown your load.

When she removes her face from the fence, it will have the marks in it, making her face look like it's been put in a waffle iron.

Richard wants to break my face after he saw the Waffle Iron I gave his sister!

waffle iron by cyn1c4l April 30, 2006