smeltzer

usually the last name of a rather sexy fellow.

also known as man with outrageously large action

can typically be heard saying
"ladies.."
"slappa dat shit like u wants it"
"who the fuck is romancing my foot?"

chick1: did u see his action
chick2: yeah it was huge.
chick1: he's definately a smeltzer

by saltines1990 June 19, 2008

Seagrams Citrus Orange Seltzer Water

A drink only liked by a few people. It is a mixture of orange soda with water. At first taste, it tastes like orange soda but then disappears into the softness of water. This gives you a half and half taste and kind of teases you to want orange soda and water. It makes you feel light headed in a way from the rapid changes in taste. Why dont you just drink water? or Orange Soda?

Guy 1: Yo have some seltzer water

Guy 2: Alright let me try it *Seagrams citrus orange seltzer water*
Guy 3: Yo that stuff is literally disgusting!

Guy 1: Dude! Its literally delicious!

Guy 4: That stuff is nasty dude

Guy 2: Yo let me try it *takes a sip*. Yo it tastes like orange soda and then water its not that bad. *a few sips later*. Yo this is nasty. *pours away the seltzer water*

Guy 3: The Guy 1's in the world would be devastated seeing you do that

Guy 1: Yo but that seltzer water tho

by Seltzerwaterchugs December 17, 2013

seltzer boy

originally conceptualized by the great visionary, chaos druid.

in theory, a seltzer boy is everything and he is nothing.

he is an abomination to the elements, destroying all that lies in his way.

The most common beverage for a seltzer boy is indeed, a 5% strength White Claw, Truly, Pure Still, or some variant of the newly popular "Alcoholic Seltzer Beverages" popularized by white girls mostly on social media.

some say, to this day the seltzer boy has never been found.

we're in houston and the airbnb is fior as hell. time for another classic episode of the seltzer boys!

seltzer boys doing it live, we in it!! just chugged a full case of claws and headed to the gym

guy 1: did you hear anthony's a seltzer boy?

guy 2: nah bro he got kicked out we can't give him anymore chances

by yunowelcomehere September 9, 2019

Shower Seltzer

The seltzer you take into the shower when you're in a hurry to go out and still need to get cleaned up, or want to relax from a long day.

Guy 1: Hey man, get going! We've got to leave in 20 minutes and you haven't even hit the shower yet!
Guy 2: I'm going, I'm going.. I haven't even started pre-gaming yet, what am I going to do?
Guy 1: No worries, I've got your solution. Take a shower seltzer.

Awesome Girlfriend: Hi honey, how was work?
Tired Boyfriend: It was stressful, my boss yelled at me and he wants me back in the office this weekend.
Awesome Girlfriend: Wow, what a day. Well don't worry, I'll start the shower and grab you a shower seltzer.

by Marit50cal July 1, 2020

Texas Seltzer

(n.) The act of putting your mouth over an anus that wants to fart.

I got one brewing. You thirsty? Can I offer you a Texas Seltzer?

by Yoggie2010 December 27, 2010

Seltzerberg

Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, better known as the directors who have created such cinematic abominations as Meet the Spartans, Disaster Movie, and Vampires Suck.

The latest Seltzerberg production was widely panned by critics yet made $15 million in its first week.

by He of One Letter August 6, 2010

Alka-Seltzer party

A bunch of very hungover and bored individuals taking their Alka-Seltzers in unison after drinking too much the night before.

..yeah, and this morning we had an Alka-Seltzer party over at Fred's. No more tequila for me for the rest of my life.

by spacecadet79 January 13, 2013