rimperative

when it is absolutely imperative that you get a rim job.

Hey honey! I need your help, its rimperative.

rimperative by marknarly December 9, 2013

institutional imperative 

1.how an entire organization can rise up to help a boss justify some deal he’s inclined to do, regardless of its merit
2. any company’s inherent propensity to do dumb things (or avoid doing smart things) simply for the sake of doing them.

1. The stock market collapse was encourage by many respected investors by participating in the overarching fininacial industry institutional imperative of rolling over debt and reselling them as investments.
2. Warren Buffett in discusing the motivation of bankers and institutional leadership in a 1989 letter. Believes that Institutions are built to appease the wishes of a few in leadership positions, to the point that employees are convinced that they are justified in all of their actions regardless of the effect. Specifically in addressing the needs and motivation of bankers, who will encourage any deal regardless of merit.

2. “Don’t ask the barber whether you need a haircut.”"It was his thinly veiled dig at Wall Street bankers and the perverse incentive system for corporate “advice” on mergers and acquisitions — namely that bankers are paid only if a deal is completed. (Bankers typically earn nothing if a deal is abandoned or collapses, giving them little reason to recommend against pursuing a transaction.)"

It was a timely note from

institutional imperative by Abcent Minded March 2, 2010

copulatory imperative 

A term used to describe males of all species. This is the explanation as to why every man is a womanizer. It clarifies why men are constantly on the move, cannot entirely commit and are consistently unfaithful. In the movie, Someone Like You, Ashley Judd’s character explains that men are habitually on the quest for "the new cow" so they can fulfill their "copulatory imperative."

Like a voracious lion seeking lunch in the Sahara, guys want to spread their seed eternally. This powerful force causes them to seek out a new and different woman after they've slept with a perfectly wonderful one. Thus, men are innately barbaric and rest assured they will never be fully domesticated.

Baby girl, what was Donald D. thinking? You're amazing. Why would leave you and sleep with that naaasty hoe?

Oh, because he just couldn’t overcome his copulatory imperative.

copulatory imperative by Educated by keen observation and tragic experience. August 10, 2007

Moral imperative 

A moral imperative is a matter of what's inside the person's mind that will compel them on how to act. It's an act of their reason, and why they choose to do so.

Her moral imperative is the reason why she does what she wants to do.

Moral imperative by Individualise November 2, 2014

Imperative 

Required or necessary

It is imperative you wear your pants to work

Imperative by D-Monkey May 24, 2018

poo-imperative 

The undeniable need to take a dump that happens after one has held it back for as long as one can. The state of mind when one's bowels decree that they must be evacuated immediately.

self -"I really don't want to use a gas station bathroom..."
ass -"poo-imperative!!"
self -"dag yo"

poo-imperative by AKAStavros November 6, 2009

categorical imperative 

A definition with teeth.

Professors will have you study this forever. Here's what you need to know. It means what it sounds like: an imperative (commandment) that you either follow, or you'll be reclassified as immoral.

Kant had his, and many people think his was the only one, but it's not true. A categorical imperative is a definition-based morality. Even the Utilitarians use them.

What will happen if I do something immoral?

You'll have done something immoral.

Oh, it's a categorical imperative.

categorical imperative by [e-mail] May 3, 2009