someone who always hangs out naked at home or spends time in nudist places, while keeping it a secret from close family and/or friends or everyone they know.
"Why did Mike sprint away when he saw that guy at the nude beach?"
"Cuz he thought he recognized him from the neighborhood, and Mike is a total closet nudist!"
Im a male and im now single i was married to this bitch named Karen she took my 3 kids and moved to hawaii and now im living in my own garage cause im too scared to sleep in the house my dick is 3.2 inches and i like to watch furry porn please hmu if u wanna smash my name is Kevin.
Me: Karen please don't go i loved to sniff ur butt cheeks when u are asleep
Karen: Nigga u stole my beans and now im stealing the kids
Me on tinder: Karen took my kids please send nudes