masticate

To grind or chew. It sounds like masturbate so dumb fucks who are too lazy to figure out its real definition assume it means masturbate. It's a funny word and has power.

I masticated my food.

masticate by w00tw00t April 5, 2003

Mastumate 

Based from the word "estimate". Mastumate is guessing how much longer one can last while masturbating.

I can probably make it through this whole video. But that is just a mastumate.

Mastumate by Fortuitus Neologist November 29, 2015

furious mastrabation 

An act of self-pleasure intended purely for the function of dealing with cronic stress. In many cases; this form of masturbation is grossly satirized with descriptions of men grinding their teeth, audibly growling, and exhibiting a pulsating forehead vein.

Larry : Dude writing my thesis fucking sucks. I'm going to fucking kill myself.

Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.

Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.

Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?

Larry : Furious masturbation?

Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.

Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.

furious mastrabation by Darker January 21, 2010

mastacate 

means to consume/eat food.

I can't talk right now. I have to mastacate.

mastacate by GurnMon October 10, 2005

mastribate 

When someone doesn't know how to spell masturbate.

I think I'll go in to the bathroom and mastribate to prawn.

mastribate by Keta September 8, 2003

Mastawate 

Waiting to masturbate, waiting for the chance to masturbate, or waiting for pornography to load so you can take a swing at your junk.

I wanted to jerk off, but i mastawated for like an hour before my mom was done using the computer.

Mastawate by Mr. Puckett February 26, 2011

mastabeta 

The best place to hang out on the intarweb for spamming, pr0n, acting st00pid in general and to get BAND!!!1112 and plus we're a bazillion times better better than teh c0ck-sucking, gay orgy-loving fagg0ts over at GenGay

Mastabeta r0x0rs j00r b0x0rs!

mastabeta by Gen[G]ay sucks hard January 30, 2004