Mastawate

Waiting to masturbate, waiting for the chance to masturbate, or waiting for pornography to load so you can take a swing at your junk.

I wanted to jerk off, but i mastawated for like an hour before my mom was done using the computer.

by Mr. Puckett February 26, 2011

masticate

To grind or chew. It sounds like masturbate so dumb fucks who are too lazy to figure out its real definition assume it means masturbate. It's a funny word and has power.

I masticated my food.

by w00tw00t April 5, 2003

Mastumate

Based from the word "estimate". Mastumate is guessing how much longer one can last while masturbating.

I can probably make it through this whole video. But that is just a mastumate.

by Fortuitus Neologist November 29, 2015

mastacate

means to consume/eat food.

I can't talk right now. I have to mastacate.

by GurnMon October 10, 2005

mastacating

THIS IS A REAL WORD! It means to chew your food.

Mom: Son, you have another phone call. Do you want me too tell them your eating diner?
Son: Yeah just tell them I'm mastacating! They'll deffinatley stop calling

by Nicole Morrow September 25, 2005

Mastuhater

A person who strongly discourages masturbation.

The anti-masturbation position is often predicated on the belief that masturbation saps sexual energy and/or is shameful.

People who argue against masturbation describe it as an addiction harmful to spiritual and bodily health that over time erodes self-control, frustrates romantic relationships, and corrupts morals.

SITUATION - Wife discovers husband masturbating

Wife: "What are you doing!?"
Husband: "Nothing."
Wife: "Great, now you won't be 'up' for having sex tonight."
Husband: "Sorry, I was horny..."
Wife: "Don't you have any self-control!?"
Husband: mumbling
Wife: "What was that?"
Husband: "Nothing, I was just saying that sometimes I'd rather jerk off... It's easier and kinda feels better."
Wife: "You're going to Hell, ya know."
Husband: "Come on, stop being such a mastuhater!"

by ORAmojo November 1, 2010

masticate

To chew, or to (literally) move the jaw up and down in a chewing motion.

It can easily be mistaken for masturbate. A very good word to play around with, it is; so much that I played around with a newspaper teacher's mind by using it in a piece of writing.

You're a masticator, aren't you?
Yes, you are, you bad, bad man.
You like to masticate meat.
Just admit it, yeah, yeah.

by Drake Aldan March 7, 2004