Literally one of the smallest and richest towns on Long Island. The
people here are filthy rich Irish Republicans. The teens are all over-sheltered, spoiled and sometimes weirdos because they have been sent to catholic schools by their
racist parents in lieu of the great and diverse Malverne
School District. The town is bordered by Lynbrook and West Hempstead. Everyone here eats bagels and
Pizza. We all LOVE Danny's Bagels. You will find thicker long island accents here and expensive sports cars parked in front of beautiful, yet modestly sized homes. Everyone has been to Malverne Cinema and has watched Malverne Mel on groundhog day. The teens all go to Lynbrook and West Hempstead to hang out and party because there's too many old
people in Malverne. We have our own tiny
police department made up of overpaid and under-worked officers who confiscate teens skateboards, harass the minority kids who go to the public schools, and wait for speeders on Ocean Avenue. Everyone knows everyone and there is an extreme community
vibe here. An all around great place to live in the end.
"I'm from Malverne, I go to Kellenberg High"
Person #
1: Where are you from?
Person #2: Malverne
Person #
1: Wheres that?
Person #1: Where are you from?
Person #2: Malverne
Person #2: You must have
money.