fewtility 

Not quite so bad as uselessness, but still not having all dat many things going for it.

Claiming affluenza and then fleeing to Mexico is a good example of an exercise in fewtility --- yes, you may indeed actually succeed in gaining yourself a small number of extra days of freedom, but eventually da chickens are gonna come home to roost, and then you'll still get put in da slammer after all.

fewtility by QuacksO April 8, 2023

futility 

Performing an action that has no results.

Andy's futility knows no bounds... He rotates squares in Tetris.

futility by Macros-the-Black August 29, 2012

relative futility 

As it pertains to economic "Law of Diminishing Returns", and Maslow
relative futility is the measure of fucks you are obligated to risk on

a useless venture.
This is reached when the odds of a return on the investment = LESS THAN ZERO

The relative futility of meeting an active brain cell in this dump is absolute,

so I save 10 bucks if I PASS on that useless venture!
Karmic return = Finding 8$ STNG Collector's set "Dixon Hill" and "Gloria"
at nerd shop down the street = "SO MUCH WIN"

relative futility by Thygeekgoddess March 11, 2017

exercise in futility 

I. an action that is generally pointless and will have no effect.

II. A discussion that is useless in the bigger picture and in which neither party is actually right, even thought both sides of the argument try to win every time.

I. washing your car before a thunderstorm is an exercise in futility
Ia. trying to exterminate cockroaches

II. the unending fight over whether rock is better than rap.

exercise in futility by Herzlos March 19, 2008

fartility 

The state or quality of producing, or capability of producing copious amounts of flatulence.

John: What's that weird odor?
David: That must be Sarah passing gases again.
John: Eww... doesn't she realise there are other people around her?
David: It's not her fault. She just happens to be highly fartile.
John: Fartile?
David: Yes, she has a very potent digestive system which causes the stomach to generate an excessive amount of gases. This essentially what we in medical circles call hyper-fartility.

fartility by jks_ April 22, 2013

furtility pants 

Animal print active wear, often with pockets, normally worn by cougars that signify one who is up for it.

Bec wore her furtility pants to yoga on Friday then went straight to the singles bar.

furtility pants by halfmoonbrighton January 11, 2020

Fertility Pouch 

The layer of fatty skin on top of the abs that stretches when a woman becomes pregnant. Women that are too skinny do not have a fertility pouch and as a result have stomachs that stretch awkwardly during a typical nine-month pregnancy. After giving birth the fertility pouch allows the skin to return to its pre-conception state

Thank god for my fertility pouch. After giving birth to Liz, that extra bit of skin really helped my abs stay stretch mark free.

Fertility Pouch by Me.....and other people October 21, 2010