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failion

a failion is a unit of measurement representing the degree of fail applied

failions can be represented by negative units (ie -3 failions); thus representing units of win

note: see fail scale for more information
"Dude, Joey totally earned himself a few failions the other day after trying to cop a feel on Mrs. Gresham and nearly being knocked out."
by iNhibitor March 22, 2009
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failson

White, middle-class, male, useless people—who have just enough family context to not be crushed by poverty.
Felix, the failson of the family, goes downstairs at Thanksgiving, briefly mumbles, ‘Hi,’ everyone asks him how community college is going, he mumbles something about a 2.0 average, goes back upstairs with a loaf of bread and some peanut butter, and gets back to gaming and masturbating.
by the_new_new_dirtbag November 18, 2016
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Failin' Palin

Ex-governor of Alaska and ex-vice presidential canidate who refuses to just fade away quitely- what with her book tours, TV deals, and that stupid "tea party". Continues to voice her opinion on everything as if her opinion really matters anymore.
Why won't Failin' Palin just shut up and go away already! She didn't win the vice presidency (thank goodness) and she's not even a governor anymore.
by mdmsnw76 March 28, 2010
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failing up

(verb, intransitive) to derive gain in spite of failure that would usually either preclude said gain or have adverse consequences.
Even though Fred was the salesman who lost the big advertising account, he is failing up to a seat on the Board of Directors.
by Nestor W. March 5, 2008
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Failio

A person who fails.
Oh my god, your such a failio for misspelling your own name on a test.
by 3mikee_ January 9, 2009
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failson

An entitled upper-class or upper-middle-class son of a well-to-do and connected family who, despite all of the advantages he has been provided, still manages to fail at almost everything he does. In order for a failson to come into being, one or both of his parents must be highly successful by some measure in order to illuminate just how much of a failure the son is in comparison.

Failsons are typically educated at good schools that they learn almost nothing from, prone to excessive partying in their youth, and inept at almost everything except using their connections. Failsons from the wealthiest families are often charged with leading some part of family business operations, which inevitably either fail or are narrowly saved from failure by more competent people underneath them.

Despite this, a failson may be protected from the perception of his failure by his family's wealth and social status, as well as their desire not to be embarrassed. Millions have been spent to obscure the failure of these cherished baby boys. Due to this, it's not uncommon for a failson to actually imagine himself as successful, and even to be a "self-made man."

Failsons are sometimes at the center of massive social and political upheaval. One of the best examples in recent history is Russian Tsar Nicholas II of the Romanov family, whose complete incompetence led to the downfall of the Tsarist regime and eventually, the Russian Revolution.

Female: faildaughter
Gender-neutral: failspawn
"Do most influential political families have a failson?"

"Probably. Donald Trump, Jr. is a classic failson. So is Hunter Biden."

"Wait ... Was George W. Bush actually a failson? Or did he overcome it by becoming President?"

"That's a question for the ages, my friend. Is failure central to the failson, or can it be transcended through enough artificially-manufactured success on the part of the failson's family and associated cronies? The world may never know."
by dongchaser420 October 9, 2022
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Jimmy Failing

This comedian is totally Jimmy Failing!!! Get off the stage!!
by pFritzo July 10, 2014
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