1 definition by dongchaser420
An entitled upper-class or upper-middle-class son of a well-to-do and connected family who, despite all of the advantages he has been provided, still manages to fail at almost everything he does. In order for a failson to come into being, one or both of his parents must be highly successful by some measure in order to illuminate just how much of a failure the son is in comparison.
Failsons are typically educated at good schools that they learn almost nothing from, prone to excessive partying in their youth, and inept at almost everything except using their connections. Failsons from the wealthiest families are often charged with leading some part of family business operations, which inevitably either fail or are narrowly saved from failure by more competent people underneath them.
Despite this, a failson may be protected from the perception of his failure by his family's wealth and social status, as well as their desire not to be embarrassed. Millions have been spent to obscure the failure of these cherished baby boys. Due to this, it's not uncommon for a failson to actually imagine himself as successful, and even to be a "self-made man."
Failsons are sometimes at the center of massive social and political upheaval. One of the best examples in recent history is Russian Tsar Nicholas II of the Romanov family, whose complete incompetence led to the downfall of the Tsarist regime and eventually, the Russian Revolution.
Female: faildaughter
Gender-neutral: failspawn
Failsons are typically educated at good schools that they learn almost nothing from, prone to excessive partying in their youth, and inept at almost everything except using their connections. Failsons from the wealthiest families are often charged with leading some part of family business operations, which inevitably either fail or are narrowly saved from failure by more competent people underneath them.
Despite this, a failson may be protected from the perception of his failure by his family's wealth and social status, as well as their desire not to be embarrassed. Millions have been spent to obscure the failure of these cherished baby boys. Due to this, it's not uncommon for a failson to actually imagine himself as successful, and even to be a "self-made man."
Failsons are sometimes at the center of massive social and political upheaval. One of the best examples in recent history is Russian Tsar Nicholas II of the Romanov family, whose complete incompetence led to the downfall of the Tsarist regime and eventually, the Russian Revolution.
Female: faildaughter
Gender-neutral: failspawn
"Do most influential political families have a failson?"
"Probably. Donald Trump, Jr. is a classic failson. So is Hunter Biden."
"Wait ... Was George W. Bush actually a failson? Or did he overcome it by becoming President?"
"That's a question for the ages, my friend. Is failure central to the failson, or can it be transcended through enough artificially-manufactured success on the part of the failson's family and associated cronies? The world may never know."
"Probably. Donald Trump, Jr. is a classic failson. So is Hunter Biden."
"Wait ... Was George W. Bush actually a failson? Or did he overcome it by becoming President?"
"That's a question for the ages, my friend. Is failure central to the failson, or can it be transcended through enough artificially-manufactured success on the part of the failson's family and associated cronies? The world may never know."
by dongchaser420 October 9, 2022