Verb. Something that white girls can't do.
"Oh my god Janet! Did you see that girl's dress? Like I can't even!"
by Jp331 July 14, 2014
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An unknown action that somehow is necessary to life. Shocking events, positive or negative, sometimes inhibit a person from being able to 'even', resulting in the person 'literally dying'.

Scholars are unsure about what bodily functions are described by the word 'even'.
I'm literally dying because I can't even.

That event that unfolded before my eyes was so startling and against my expectations, that I have lost all my ability to even. Please call an ambulance.
by The Almaster July 17, 2014
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The name of an incredibly handsome, sexy, big dicked, hung, jacked, ripped, anabolic, well-groomed, beautiful, slippery, big-handed, womanizing and perfect male individual. They're usually very good at the sex.
Oh man, that Even sure has a big dick!

Oh my god, i wish i had someone named Even in my life!

Oh my god, Even is so incredibly handsome, sexy, big dicked, hung, jacked, ripped, anabolic, well-groomed, beautiful, slippery, big-handed, womanizing and such a perfect male individual. He is also good at the sex.
by DickieAmputee February 06, 2019
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Scandinavian name

A person with a great personality and a big... heart.

He use most of his energy to make others happy, but barely have enough left to make himself happy.

His humor is one of a kind, and he love to make dry and edgy jokes.
"Even told me a soooo bad joke that its good, i can't stop dying of laughter inside."

*Gets a compliment* "Aww, did you just do an Even? I cant even..."
by Dank_ooF December 30, 2018
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Even is a disease men can get if they spend too much time masturbating.
It causes their penis to fall off, makes them enjoy Donald Duck & Co, and turns their hair red.
"Oh no! I've gotten Even! How will I go on?! I knew I shouldn't have watched that last porno movie!"
by Pål R. October 03, 2003
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A phrase used by parents, bosses, supervisor or any person in a position of authority to all the stupid "what if" questions that are raised in a given situation.
Mom: "Put your toys away we are going to Grandma's."
Kid: "What I don't want to go?"
Mom: "We are going to Grandma's even if I have to drag you there."
by jsd96321 February 06, 2012
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