clusterfucklet

Clusterfucklet - (noun) official management term to describe something not quite so catastrophic as a true Clusterfuck, but certainly exhibiting more clusterfuckiness than a mere ballsup.

The clusterfucklet reported in the morning didn't bring the ENTIRE system down, but enough to cause some shouty emails in various directions

by tangentc June 2, 2016

Clusterfuckitis

A disease or state of illness that, while similar to the Rube Goldberg Syndrome (a chain-reaction of diseases), differs in that it has no single origin and that the patient's future is completely uncertain.

You thought your brother's case of Rube Goldberg Syndrome was bad? Mine had a total case of clusterfuckitis... first he got some weird infection during a heart surgery, then 20 years later he went crazy and biked 3000 miles in one summer, and then the infection got back at him, he had to stop biking, so then his heart had to get used to him being lazy, but couldn't, so now he's breathing all funny, bet he's gonna get pneumonia from that bug now...

by Mikey McM. February 1, 2009

Clusterfucked

When you're days away from coming out of your fourth COVID lockdown and your local health authority advises that a new and dangerous strain has just been detected and that it would be imprudent to open up until the source of the new cluster is identified. In this context, clusterfuck is a portmanteau of COVID cluster plus being situationally fucked.

Health Official: 'With the discovery of this new and highly transmissible variant, which is unrelated to the existing outbreak, the government will not be relaxing COVID restrictions as previously scheduled. In summary, you have just been clusterfucked"

by Ernest_Hemmingroid June 4, 2021

clusterfuckemus

The unrelenting and unceasing fuckening of one's life by outside forces such as governmental ineptitude, inadequate world pandemic response, unending financial crises, escalating social unrest and the total denial of reality by a significant percentage of the population.

The year 2020 has been a total clusterfuckemus.

by ILUsion54 November 13, 2020

clusterfucked

To be completely and totally screwed. To be in a state of utter, unavoidable, unthinkably insane screwage. A point in which one feels as though there is no way out of a current situation or predicament.

I was on this plane taxiing down the runway when a commuter train ran off the tracks and crashed through the airport fence. This event then caused a freeway overpass to collapse sending roughly 200 automobiles down towards the plane. The train was coming at us along with the cars and I said aloud "We're so clusterfucked".

by MacSawD November 26, 2004

clusterfuckery

a mess of confusion, disorganization, bungling or incompetence

I woulda been on time if not for the heinous clusterfuckery of traffic.

The meeting was a solid hour of clusterfuckery.

by Lynn January 23, 2004

clusterfucker

The person who is in charge (usually military) at the time of a clusterfuck. This person is usually inept at his/her job, and has used all possible resources to carry out a simple, straightforward task, only to start a cataclysmic chain of events.

One who clusterfucks, or has been clusterfucking. Can also be referred to as one who has been up to a bit of clusterfuckery.

1. "But General, I asked the Lieutenant to polish the big red button not push it. I know we have inadvertently started a major nuclear war with the worlds biggest superpower, but it should be that clusterfucker Corporal facing the firing squad, not me Sir."

2. "That window cleaner has not only made the windows dirtier, but he's also smashed four pains of glass and killed my dog! Well, I suppose I'd better go and give that clusterfucker his money before I phone the glazier and find the spade."

3. "I wish I wasn't such a useless clusterfucker."

by clusterfukr January 2, 2010