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Techboner

" Ned got a techboner "
by Vampingmaster September 25, 2014
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Technoherpes

Also known as computer viruses, Technoherpes infects your computer and forces it to perform wildly varying activities without your knowledge...at first...then the hate-filled emails from everyone you know start to pour into your mailbox!

Technoherpes infection is normally caused by social manipulation, and most Technoherpes infestations are caused by a complete lack of forethought on the part of the computer operator clicking links without thinking AT ALL about what they're clicking on.

Thank our wonderful politicians for destroying the educational system, and the media for never making note that people are, for the most part, no longer capable of critical thinking, and will quickly click on a link to the most moronic things without thinking for even a millisecond, if they expect even the tinest bit of entertaining idiocy.

Easiest avoidance measures: Using a little-known and seldom used anatomical fat deposit known as "the brain." (No, not Pinky's friend...the other one...)

Note: "The Brain" should also be employed during the lead up, and while VOTING, although over the last century or so, there is no evidence that this is a common practise until AFTER the criminals have been voted in. The second a new election is called, there appears to be a genetic switch that instantly terminates all higher brain function until the day after the actual vote has occurred.
Technoherpes is normally spread via such channels as:

Links for discount shoes, dating sites, free credit report services, and more. If it was in the news recently, its a potential source of technoherpes infection!

Emails about how a Nigerian prince who needs YOU to "hold millions of dollars, in return for a percentage", US military Iraqi/BinLaden/Afghani/etc. cash hordes, dying widows of billionnaires who have noone else to leave their fortunes to, et cetera.

Of course, you can't forget about what started it all...PENIS ENLARGEMENT EMAILS!

Honestly, if those things worked, we'd all be able to take a whiz in Central Park by this point, right?

No...it wouldn't even matter what state or country you were in at the time! We've all seen THOUSANDS of those emails by this point, and at "a guaranteed minimum of three inches" per email...now you're talking in MILES!
by ElectroPig von FökkenGrüüven November 14, 2011
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technoperve

Like technosexual, however, a person actually gets sexually aroused over gadgets.
Adrian: I have just got a N95 and now i am hard!
Sam: You are a technoperve
by Sammybaby April 11, 2007
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Teboner

When your penis achieves an erection for no reason.
I was hesitant to get up in front of everybody since I was sporting a Teboner.
by Schnappy pappy January 9, 2012
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Teboner

(pronounced Tee-Boner)
when a Florida Gators fan hears the name Tim Tebow and gets a boner
Steve: Tebow sucks
Tod: Damnit Steve, you gave me a Teboner
by A non mous December 20, 2008
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Tenboner Explosivo

Something that is so cool, words hardly contain it. Surpasses even ballsdeep,
Mignola's Art of Hellboy is Tenboner Explosivo.
by Fetorpse August 17, 2003
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TechnoBoner

When a person gets so excited about technology, or nerdy stuff that they get an erection/hard-on/boner from the digital lust of new technology. Usually related to new or unreleased technology, televisions, i-phones, zunes, hard drives (thats what she said), etc. When in a public setting the term Technoboner can be shortened to "TB" in order to hide your heightened state and preserve your dignity. . . Unless you have a huge erection in which case your screwed.
I can't believe how incredible this new Zune HD is with it's touchscreen, HD output, HD radio and intuitive software. Every time i use it i totally get a Technoboner.
by That guy Kyle November 1, 2009
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