Skip to main content

Noob's Opening

A chess opening using by noobs/newbs etc who think they know how to play the game, but actually lack the fundemental understanding and intelligence necessary for chess. The opening consists of:

1. e4 e5
2. Qh5 ...

At which poing if White is allowed to take the Black e5 pawn with the Q it is a very strong position for him, especially as it comes with Check. This is known as the Noob Opening position. However, Black simply plays:

...Nc6

to guard the pawn. The typical noob will then play:

3. Bc4

With a threat of check mate with Qxf7. However, Black then plays:

...g6

After which the noob will play:

4. Qf3

This is the Uber-Noob's Opening position. After Black's next move of:

...Nf6

White's "attack" is over and Black has an enormous lead in development.

So in summary, the noob believes he is going to get a fast check-mate with Qxf7, but any black player worth their while will quicky avoid this and gain an enormous lead in piece development and in most cases will force the White Q all the way back to its starting square: hence a complete waste of time.
The Noob's Opening is typically played by gobby teenage chess players who will talk trash during the game to try and distract the other player.
by BoomBox ChavCar October 4, 2009
mugGet the Noob's Opening mug.

St. Noob's Day

The original date in which the word "Noob" was created. the exact day is not known therefore people have made there own dates. officially the dates are as follows, 4th of January, 23rd of March, 1st of August, and 13th of September. on these days it is considered ok to act like a noob.
Person 1:"Dude why are you noob-tubing everyone?!?!?!"
Person 2: "it's alright man it's St. Noob's Day today!"
by FunkyHat July 26, 2009
mugGet the St. Noob's Day mug.

Noob O's

When beating a Noob in a video game you could say to them "Hey did you forget to eat you're Noob O's this morning?"
by Jason Gonzalez November 19, 2007
mugGet the Noob O's mug.

noob shit

worse then a noob..noob shit... the most pathetic thing to be called on a game
by wspu123 May 11, 2009
mugGet the noob shit mug.

Noob Season

The days following a holiday in which noobs receive video games that are a year (or more) old; while the non-noobs move on to a sequel, the noobs provide easy kills/XP for those who still do not have the sequel and are not noobs.
Person 1: Dude I have 5000 points in kills in Assasin's Creed Brotherhood multiplayer.

Person 2: Don't you have the sequel yet?

Person 1: No, I have no cash. But it's noob season out here. I'm almost to level 50.
by GhostofSparta010 December 31, 2011
mugGet the Noob Season mug.

Noob Swerve

When one moves their body in real life acting like they are moving their character in game.
Gerald is getting shot at and needs to get around a corner, while he is getting around the corner he is also doing the Noob Swerve in real life.
by JOLT3D July 29, 2012
mugGet the Noob Swerve mug.

Noob scout

1. Someone who face checks everything.
2. A noob...thats a scout.
3. A word some noob made to have more words about himself.
Joe H. is suuuuch a noob scout.
by A noob scout July 15, 2011
mugGet the Noob scout mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email