Masturbook

When you close your eyes and randomly hit a letter into your facebook search bar and jerk off to the first decent girl on the results.

*Thinking to self*
I don't know who to jerk off to... I'll just masturbook

Masturbook by BlahBlahxx54 August 5, 2011

Masturbaker's dozen 

The pinnacle of all dedicated feckless cum-shedders whereby the participant aims to ejaculate more than 13 times in a 24 hour period. 13 loads in generally accepted by industry insiders as being the level that separates the men from the boys.

'I did it , I did the masturbaker's dozen! Admittedly the last six were with a floppy and the jizz was purely gaseous, but by golly I finally did it. Now it's off to the doctor for me to get some ointment for the blisters and tennis elbow..'

Masturbaker's dozen by Anonymous submissions December 10, 2016

masturboxing 

A man who beatboxes while masturbating.

I was sitting in the bus the other day when I heard a guy behind me beatbox, so I turned around and saw that he also was masturbating. I was like... "WTF, MASTURBOXING?"

masturboxing by Sarahreen September 30, 2009

Masturjoking 

When one tells a joke only to please themselves. The masturjoker often intends to please a crowd with their joke, but ultimately fails, and is the only one laughing.

Adam: "Man Alex thinks he is really funny, masturjoking over there. No one gets his humor."

Jess: "Well you always tell him to try out his jokes on kids first!"

Alex *laughing* "Oh man I'm so funny!!"

Masturjoking by Icebiker March 18, 2011

Masturbowling 

The act of smoking marijuana by one's self, esp. after failing to locate a partner to smoke with you.

"Annie and Jane said they wanted to blaze with me, but they left with Tom so now I'm stuck masturbowling."

You: "You wanna go get some food?"
Me: "Give me ten minutes, I'm trying to masturbowl in here."
You: "......whatever you do, please wash your hands."

Masturbowling by tightnbright October 22, 2011

masturbocalypse 

When the entire world spontaneously begins masturbating non-stop to the point where no fewer than 99% of the world's population dies of starvation and malnutrition.

After the masturbocalypse there may be a few remaining survivors, but they will most likely envy the dead, as without an internet, there will be much less masturbation material.

If the naked Anna Kournikova emails had been real, it could very well have kicked off the masturbocalypse.

masturbocalypse by Tandazzle October 24, 2008

Masturboat 

Whilst a man and a women are oriented head to toe with the women on top, the woman straddles the mans face with her breasts. The man begins to motorboat the women's breasts. Meanwhile the women is masturbating the man below. This could also be accomplished with two woman. Or a combination of large breasted men.

We shall masturboat, for your breast's are delightful.

Masturboat by Wayne Rathbun April 21, 2013