Masturjoking

When one tells a joke only to please themselves. The masturjoker often intends to please a crowd with their joke, but ultimately fails, and is the only one laughing.

Adam: "Man Alex thinks he is really funny, masturjoking over there. No one gets his humor."

Jess: "Well you always tell him to try out his jokes on kids first!"

Alex *laughing* "Oh man I'm so funny!!"

by Icebiker March 18, 2011

masturboxing

A man who beatboxes while masturbating.

I was sitting in the bus the other day when I heard a guy behind me beatbox, so I turned around and saw that he also was masturbating. I was like... "WTF, MASTURBOXING?"

by Sarahreen September 30, 2009

masturjacking

Masturbation in an extreme sense.

He was perched up on the sink like a monkey, bent over and masturjacking like there was no tomorrow.

by Eiden December 1, 2003

masturbiking

The act of masturbating while biking by rhythmically rubbing your crotch against your bike seat. Virtually unnoticeable while in motion, this seems to be a mainly female practice.

Hey Jane, how was your commute this morning?
Great! I was masturbiking all the way up 1st Ave!

by masturbiker January 31, 2014

Masturbaking

Self pleasure through baking goods or cooking foods.

I caught my brother Masturbaking this weekend, it was a real mess and he didn't let me have any of the cake.

by William Andrew Butler January 21, 2008

Masturjaying

When a cougar masturbates to fantasies of having STFU Sex with jay.

-Phone Rings.
Girl 1: I'll call you back, I'm masturjaying.
Girl 2: You mean masturbating?
Girl 1: No, like, Jay is my master. The ruler of my domain.

or

"Oh damn I'm horny, wait till i get home, I'm going to masturjay all night"

or

"Let's have phone sex"
"Okay, you could listen to me while I masturjay"

by Cougarlicious July 1, 2008

Masturbaking

The art of making love to a variety of baked goods. i.e french Baguettes, pita bread, loafs, muffins, crumpets, custard creams and all other sexually attractive baked goods.

Stuart found a stale french baguette in his bread bin and began masturbaking. To his horror it was soggy because his dad had already masturbaked in it earier that day.

"Stuart!, what are you doing with that bakery item?"
"Piss off Dad, I'm Masturbaking!"

by George Daniels August 1, 2012