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Maskturbate 

To pump one's pumpernickel in public or recreationally beneath the cloak of complete anonymity and comfort that only a mask can provide.
On Halloween we're gonna go around the neighborhood and maskturbate on people's lawns, you in?
Urban Dictionary Merch

masturbate and switch 

Masturbate and switch — the erotic KINK of having sex with one person while thinking of another; or, of talking dirty to a sexual partner and allowing them to verbally — either from your mouth or theirs — acknowledge deep sexual attraction for another person; or, for an extreme sexual scenario.

This is not a practice for the sexually insecure — unless insecurity is your particular KINK!!!!!

On the one hand, if one wants to enjoy the depth sexuality of another, the partner has to be made to feel comfortable physically, mentally and spiritually.

On the other hand, one would have to ask if their ego is strong enough to facilitate the unbridled sexuality and fantasy life of another.

Well…you don’t hit home runs unless you swing for the fences. And, on the other hand, if you swing too hard and miss YOU CAN STRIKE OUT!!!!!!

Unless you are a “sex-pert” DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME!!!!!!!

But if you are ever semi-single in Negril at a Club Med — and you didn’t hear this from me — give it a shot!!!!!!!

Remember: NOT A PRACTICE FOR THE SEXUALLY TIMID AND INSECURE!!!!!!
Him: Wow, that was a quick orgasm, babe!!! You must have been really horny.

Her: Naw. I did a masturbate and switch and IT GOT REALLY GOOD TO ME!!!!!!

Him: Tell me what you were thinking so I can masturbate and switch, too!!!!!!!!!

Masturbaker's dozen 

The pinnacle of all dedicated feckless cum-shedders whereby the participant aims to ejaculate more than 13 times in a 24 hour period. 13 loads in generally accepted by industry insiders as being the level that separates the men from the boys.
'I did it , I did the masturbaker's dozen! Admittedly the last six were with a floppy and the jizz was purely gaseous, but by golly I finally did it. Now it's off to the doctor for me to get some ointment for the blisters and tennis elbow..'

masturbasement 

secluded, underground space in your home where you can finally jerk off in peace
"After my wife goes to sleep and I kick all of my guy friends out of my downstairs mancave, I get out my pornos and turn it into my very own private masturbasement."
masturbasement by Eric Rohmer October 10, 2014

masturbate 

Act people commit when browsing Urban Dictionary
masturbate by 32121 July 22, 2016

masturbate 

To stimulate the genitals for a jolt of pleasure (orgasm).
John wanted to masturbate, so he clicked on the computer in the darkly lit room. He typed “porn hub” into the search bar and took off his jeans. He quickly took off his boxers and let his dick feel the fresh air. He clicked the most popular result and started watching the porn.
He felt his dick harden when he got to the sex. He felt aroused, so he started to wank. It filled him up with pleasure. The head of his dick became covered with precum and he started wanking faster. It felt so good to him. He started to stroke it and rub it. His penis was dripping with precum.

He felt his dick become heavy and the head full. The threesome on the screen were arousing John even more. John let out a deep moan of pleasure and a hot stream of jizz sprayed out of his member. Semen covered his lap, as his dick bobbled around to let out a few more spurts of cum. He kept wanking, then his door opened. John was so scared, he almost ripped his dick off.
His dick layed flaccid across his naked legs, then he walked to the bathroom, his legs coated with semen.
masturbate by Well, shit. December 21, 2017

masturbate 

stimulate one's own genitals for sexual pleasure.
stimulate the genitals of (someone) to give them sexual pleasure. to make yourself feel so good and tingle-y inside when your bored or horney and when you make yourself feel fucking amazing.. here's an example for girls lay backwards on a bed and spread your legs a little apart.. then put your hands in your pants (if you're wearing them) and open your vagina lips with your index finger and middle finger.. once you've opened your vagina gently move your middle finger around (up and down, side to side, counterclockwise) whatever pleases you most.. rub gently up and down.. now after awhile your pussy will get used to your fingers, now is time for your middle finger to be a little more aggressive.. moving farther down the pussy gives you a tingley-feeling and going in and out of your hole feels really good now if your pretty gentle it might make a squeezing sound of your vagina licquids or cum (this is normal) by now your body is probably movin all around your bed with your finger be used it feels so good.. it helps to close your eyes and moan a little.. spreading your index and ring finger a little further will give you more access to rubbing.... side effects will probably give your pussy a tingle
I love to make myself feel pleasure.. it's called to masturbate
More from Urban Dictionary
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot 

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".
Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."
God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011
Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken 

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.
Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?
city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006
Word of the Day on September 17, 2026

Is that cake?

Another way to say is this fake? Like the show real or cake
“Slayyyter just announced another album last night”
“No way, is that cake?”
“Yeah whoops this isn’t real”
Is that cake? by Sexyyred September 15, 2026
Word of the Day on September 16, 2026
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