Earsighted 

Most men, particularly husbands, are earsighted - the condition of being borderline deaf when 3 feet from their spouse. Problem amplified when their wife is assigning chores or talking about her day. Fortunately, those afflicted with being earsighted are usually quite adept at hearing far away, like when their friend has pulled into the driveway to take them away.

The doctor put down his ear scope after examining Jeff and asked him if his wife started a new job. Upon Jeff confirming, the ear doctor explained that Jeff was suffering from a case of being earsighted.

Earsighted by Grant Rampus January 28, 2022

Nearsighted Date 

As opposed to a blind date, where you have no idea what the other person looks like, a nearsighted date is one where you've seen a photo or chatted via web cam before meeting in person.
This can often lead to disappointment if one person or the other has supplied misleading documentation.

"Well, I saw her profile pics on Facebook, so it was more of a nearsighted date than a blind date"

"That's the last nearsighted date I ever go on...her profile pic must have been 5 years, 3 hair colors and 2 kids ago."

"Went on a nearsighted date last night. The picture he emailed me must have been from before he quit the gym."

Nearsighted Date by bunn28 January 4, 2010

rearsighted 

A. Inability to see past someone's physical attributes, particularly the derriere. B. Particularly fond of the ass.

Man: Check her out!
Friend: She's not very pretty, dude.
Man: I'm rearsighted, man.

rearsighted by Memphotank June 19, 2010

Nearsighted Gynecologist 

Having to be very close to a vagina or a butt.

Nearsighted Gynecologist- being extremely close than usual to a womans genitals.
Well, I hope you clean your booty really good, because I would hate to be your gynecologist.

Nearsighted Gynecologist by Phoneix86 May 6, 2018

nearsightedness 

adj.

Used to describe someone who looks at things biased, without taking into consideration the grander scope of things. Focusing on one point, and sticking with it, oblivious to other factors effecting the situation.

So and so blamed another person for flaming whilest that person was only defending ones self. So and so was demonstrating nearsightedness by not fully understanding the entire situation.

nearsightedness by Jeff560-54653 January 2, 2006

exsighted 

She didn't see me, but I saw her.

I was in an adult novelty shop buying lubrication for a strawberry flavored relationship that I am now enjoying when behind a green plastic bag of dirty laundry, that ghosting bastard, lo and behold, exsighted.

exsighted by Charlie Currie, wordsmith April 11, 2019

farsighted 

When a girl or guy looks good from across the room but when she gets closer they are ugly.

Joe: "Hey Jeff remember that girl we saw at the club last night? Did you think she was cute?"

Jeff: "Man at first I did but then she came closer and I realized she was farsighted"

farsighted by doesmynamematter August 31, 2014