Battlejacks 

Any sporting event where there is a tie must result in a tie breaker called battlejacks. Two opponents sit indian style across from each other and will jack each other off. Loser is who ejaculates first.

Chris and Mark tied in golf resulting in the first battlejacks match in history. The match between Mark and Chris was back and forth. Ultimately Mark retained the belt after Chris exploded. Chris later won the world championship training vigorously and retained his title for many years.

Battlejacks by Agnothin April 24, 2024

battlehawks 

The only football franchise located in St. Louis. They play in the XFL and are the only team in the league who’s logo was not created on a video game by an 8 year old. The team is named after the most feared bird In the sky. The legendary Battle Hawk has dominated every challenger, and is well represented with dominating play on the field. The intensity of Battlehawks play is only matched by their rowdy post game celebrations.

The current hard seltzer shortage was caused by the Battlehawks celebration after their win over the Renegades.

battlehawks by Kb25 February 10, 2020

battlelack

Any combination of an old, fat, gnarled, unsightly woman who is frumpy, dresses weird, etc. who doesn't have anything going for them besides their many cats at home.

Take a look at this old battlelack, she can't even drive.

battlelack by Spartans! August 7, 2006

bottlejack 

Noun: A device or place or person that raises your spirits
Verb: to raise one's spirits

When you get the blues a friend is usually a good bottlejack

Judith bottlejacked Pearl when she was feeling down in the dumps

bottlejack by Nilgoa July 31, 2016

battleyack 

Russian sex move - to battleyack that dirty bit.

Oh I'm tottally gona battle that chick!
Dude last night I met this chick at the club, didn't even get to the parkinglot.... She totally started battleyackin me!
Don cherry was the outcome of one crazy ass battleyackin!

battleyack by abe reimer January 16, 2011

bottlejack 

a person who prepares or mixes of distils his own spirits

I don't like bartenders. I'd rather be my own bottlejack

bottlejack by Rumesh April 5, 2017

The Bottlejack 

When one has a blockage in ones anus due to a heavy dose of codeine. ..When the blockage starts pushing on its travels and heads for sunlight ,one quickly de-pants ,lays on back with legs in the air and proceeds to push the turd out in short bursts (carefully as not to snap it off)whilst making a pumping motion on your penis somewhat resembling a bottle jack

JONESY QUICKLY JUMPED ON THE LOUNGEROOM FLOOR AND PUMPED OUT A QUICK THE BOTTLEJACK.. GREAT PARTY TRICK MATE BUT NEXTIME NOT IN FRONT OF THE IN LAWS

The Bottlejack by medugs September 3, 2016