telecommute 

the act of impersonating an actual real employee by the implementation of various technological devices and equipment. the telecommuter is actually home laughing at his colleagues and will occasionally send an email to the office or provide an added view on a topic which no one remembers discussing.

I can't believe some people get paid the same as I do to stay home.....I better start telecommuting too!

telecommute by MintyLeila July 21, 2005

telecommuting 

The ability to find yourself fully surrounded by incompetent idiots while working from the comfort of your own home.

I may be working in my pj's, but through the magic of telecommuting, I'm still stuck dealing with these morons all day.

telecommuting by annoyed12345 May 11, 2011

reverse telecommuting 

Bringing personal work to the office: paying bills, playing games and reading online newspapers on company time (OCT).

reverse telecommuting by C.J.Matrix September 9, 2003

Telecommuning 

Once trend, now status quo of spending more virtual time with our fellow human beings than actual face-time.
The act of living through social media, online games, email and text-messages rather than picking up the phone (as initially intended) to CALL another person or as a means to truly "stay in touch" via conversation or to facilitate actual get-togethers or live social events.
A reliance on having numerous online "followers" that staves off loneliness the way a picnic ora good, old-fashioned softball game with friends, acquaintances and family members once did.
Like telecommuTing, a form of attendance and human interaction we can manage from "virtually" anywhere, diminishing the need for proximity with family, friends and coworkers.

"Thanks to telecommuting and telecommuning I never need to leave the house!"
"Ashley is super popular. She telecommunes with her 19,000 closest friends all the time!"

Telecommuning by TheSquidGirl May 24, 2014

telecommunicable

In a public setting, i.e. dinner or a waiting room, when one person gets on a cell phone, the other(s) at the table are compelled to be on their phones also. The faster the other cell phones come out is directly proportional to those individual's lack of self-esteem.

1. Joe and Jen are on a date, Jen gets a call. Within moments, like a telecommunicable disease, Joe whips out his phone and begins randomly texting his friends.

2. While waiting for the nurse to come in, fidgety Phil whips out his cell phone to call his buddy. In response, others in the waiting room start diddling with their phones.

telecommunicable by Jorg Sacul September 10, 2008

telecommutants 

telecommutants spend all or most of their workday at coffee chains, using computers or other telecommunications equipment. The mere cost of a latte and low fat chocolate twist entitles telecommutants to appropriate rent-free virtual office space to themselves with impunity.

"I'll get the coffee and you find us a table."

"I would, but the whole place is invaded with telecommutants!"

telecommutants by relaxfrancis October 13, 2009

telecommunicative mutual masturbation 

A sex act in which two or more people stimulate themselves sexually, either with hands or toys, while on the phone with each other. This act is often practiced by those in a long distance relationship.

We should get some telecommunicative mutual masturbation action going on; I'm so horny.

telecommunicative mutual masturbation by bloodytv May 9, 2010