As the family looked out at Mt. Rushmore, a bird flew overhead and took a shit on the mountain. The boy saw this and said; "Mom, that bird made it Mt. Shitmore."
"I'll take my turn in the bathroom in a couple minutes right after I smoke a shitarette."
"Want to finish this half-smoked grit? I just needed a quick shitarette and it already did the trick."
"Get out of the bathroom!" yelled Jeff as he shut the front door and removed his jacket, having just returned -- buttcheeks clenched -- from his morning shitarette.