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I'm not trying to start shit 

The phrase that you use right before you tell someone something that you know will start a lot of shit.
I'm not trying to start shit but Ty called your mother a whore.

I'm Not Trying To Be Slutty 

What women, who are too provocative and who love to show too much skin, say when shamelessly playing the whore card.
I'm not trying to be slutty," said Cyrus in a recent interview. "I'm not trying to be like, go to the club and get a bunch of guys."

"I'm trying to keep in touch with friends, not ridicules trends, stay on one social network site you fools" 

Well it basically a saying i just made up, about how there those people who keep jumping to the latest social network.
friend 1 - I think Imma get a facebook now, since everyone seems to be getting one

friend 2 - yea me too

friend 3 - yea myspace is so last year

friend who doesn't give a fuck - "I'm trying to keep in touch with friends, not ridicules trends, stay on one social network site you fools"