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goo harpoon

1. (noun) Slang term for a penis usually used in the context of sexuality.

2. (noun) A pointed instrument thrown for distance in competitive sports similar to a javelin but is made of a viscous material and rarely sticks in the ground on impact. Much less popular than a wood harpoon or a steel harpoon. Can also be used in hunting but is rarely effective as it usually bounces off the animal being hunted.
1.

SMITTY: So? Would you throw Ugly Betty the ol' goo harpoon or what?
WAYNE: Naw, man. Not unless I had about ten beers in me.

2.

The Swedish athlete was disqualified because he tripped over his own goo harpoon.
goo harpoon by Mickey Nation December 14, 2008

man the harpoons 

phrase

usually used in a situation when a fat chick walks into a bar, party or any area with shallow males.
"oh man, here comes that fat bitch, man the harpoons!"

rusty harpoon 

When someone lays face down on the living room floor and then proceeds to aggressively sleepfinger their butthole.
Chad was so drunk that he gave himself a rusty harpoon.

While putting in his contacts in, Chad had the sudden and horrifying realization that he gave himself a rusty harpoon. Chad has pinkeye.
rusty harpoon by SpaceJoshtin February 10, 2014

Man the Harpoons 

When you pass by an obese chick, "Man the Harpoons" is the phrase you use. Because, oh man, that whale is huuuuuge.
"Holy crap...that chick is a freakin' whale..."
"MAN THE HARPOONS!!!!!!!!"

Flesh Harpoon 

A lethal cock. One look at a flesh harpoon and a woman is instantly seduced into riding said harpoon for hours.
Stacy was being a prude holdout bitch so I had to whip out my flesh harpoon and pull her in for the kill.
Flesh Harpoon by Lazynutz July 7, 2005

The Harpoons

That which must be manned.

Used in jest when an overweight and obnoxious girl enters the room and you want her removed. Alludes to whaling harpoons.

Or, simply, a joke to crack when a large woman is observed.
*an obese, obnoxious woman enters room*

Charlie: Oh my god, that is horrid! We're gonna die!!!

Dane: She'll eat us alive, for sure! AAHH!!

Keith: Nonsense! The harpoons, Charlie! Man them at once!

*battle ensues*
The Harpoons by mightymoksha September 28, 2009
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
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