godblocked 

Godblocked refers almost synonymously to the term "cockblocked." However, this form only occurs when there are natural phenomena which only God could be controlling that are blocking your cock from vaginal penetration or other womanly pleasures.

While my girlfriend Allisyn was studying abroad in Indonesia, she sent me a letter one day saying "I miss you. Being away from you makes me realize just how much I truly love you. I want you to be my first the minute I get off of that plane back home." I was excited.
A month later, I got a call from her mother. Her mom said that Allisyn, a geology major, had been studying the contours of Mt. Krakatoa when it suddenly erupted. Her body was found three days later but she was obviously dead and her vagina had turned to obsidian. I totally got godblocked.

godblocked by Shawn J. R. January 1, 2008

Godblocked 

When you've pulled out all the stops to ensure that you will get laid and you get all the way to the bedroom only to have your advances rejected at the last moment due to some allegiance to an invisible deity or code of ethics from an outdated book.

John: Dude, I had it all set up, house to ourselves, candles, a stupid chick movie, I played tears in heaven for her, i had my face as smooth as a baby's ass, got her wet, took her to the bedroom, got naked, and she's all like, "the bible says.. blah blah blah." I was like omfg!

Dave: You totally got Godblocked dude. Did you enjoy blue balls?

John: Eat shit asshole.

Godblocked by G-Fizzlezorz February 9, 2010

Goldilocked 

Remember when Goldilocks went to the bears house and ate the porridge? One was too hot, one was too cold, and one was just right, etc, etc. Goldilocked (The Goldilocks Effect) is when something/someone is just right.

"Omg dude! I found the perfect burger."
"Oh real?"
"Yeah! Not too much sauce.. Heaps of cheese.."
"Oh mean!"
"Yeah bro."
"That burger sounds goldilocked as."

Goldilocked by TheHannburger August 4, 2009

godblock 

similar to the cockblock, a godblock is the loss of a sexual action(s) because omnipotent reasoning by the other partner. This can be due to finding god or becoming closer to god, and believing that god disproves of that sexual act.

My girlfriend and i where having sex until she realized that god does not approve of sex until marriage. She immediately stopped having sex with me, a classic godblock.

godblock by fishsticksgayfish April 9, 2009

Goblocker 

A cock. A dick. A penis.

Man 1 - "Hey, you're such a Goblocker!"

Man 2 - "What the hell is a Goblocker dude? A cock. You know, coz they block sluts gobs. ZING!"

Goblocker by Godflesh May 24, 2011

Codblocked

Prevented from being able to play Call of Duty because a friend and/or sibling is already playing it.

Yo, I'm gonna go play some Call of Duty!

Can't. Dave's already playing.

Darn. Codblocked again.

Codblocked by Phoenix Warfunden July 25, 2010

Godblocking 

The act of refusing to have sex because of a religious duty or commitment, commonly seen by hot Catholic Latinas that refuse to put out, but act like sluts. Side effects include blueballs and newly converted atheists.

Ouch dude. That's a hell of a Godblocking.

Godblocking by MaryGoRound July 9, 2011