defebation 

Using defecation a pretense to use the bathroom for masturbation.

The other day, I went into the work bathroom for defebation, and my boss was none the wiser.

defebation by scotchfordinner October 9, 2016

Faux Defecation 

When one sits on the john for some amount of time before realizing they cannot release their fecal matter. The cause is sometimes constipation. However this is not always the case; the cause may be unknown. It is not uncommon for one to release gas during this period of time. Time elapsed before the epiphany varies greatly, experts suggest times from 1 minute all the way to a rare case in Japan in which the subject took over 27 hours (exact time is unknown). The mean is 11 minutes. The standard deviation, or σ, is approximately 7 minutes. Time does vary between species and sex.

(Whilst watching a football game)
John: Brb, I gotta take a dump. *10 minutes later*
Henry: Dude wtf are you doing? You just missed Janet Jackson's boob!
John: Damn I can't shit!
Henry: Oh man, you must have a case of Faux Defecation

Faux Defecation by gingyman January 9, 2010

anti-defecation league 

An organization dedicated to protecting non-terrorists who find themselves on government shit-lists.

Now that I have unfairly been added to a gubmint shit-list, the only place I can look for help from is the Anti-Defecation League.

anti-defecation league by LaughingAloud August 18, 2017

Total Delegation Meltdown 

A disastrous event produced when the manager delegates every possible aspect of the planning to others who have real jobs and don't actually complete anything on schedule.

David go to Dublin this week? Who wouldn't want to go to Dublin?

Dude, none of the presentations were ready - there was a total delegation meltdown.

Total Delegation Meltdown by PsychoPuppyDad October 4, 2011

morning deflation 

When you wake up and start deflating after a nice long night of building up gas throughout your digestive system.

"*beepbeep, beepbeep, beepbeep*
*Stretch, yawn, fart, burp*
Looks like I have started my morning deflation"

"Honey can you take your morning deflation to the bathroom?"

"If I don't start my morning deflation soon I might explode"

morning deflation by The_ALCH June 15, 2019

Defamation 

Using slanderous speech to attack one’s reputation and career

Defamation does not include:
-Telling T-Series to hold their defacation
-T-Series can eat a dick
-Suck my fuckin’ swedish meatballs
-Did you know that Indians have poo-poo in their brains?

Defamation by StillNotDefamation April 1, 2019

anti-defamation league 

An organization that once fought bigotry, now taken over by insane social justice warriors. The ADL is responsible for hilariously declaring the OK symbol to be a racist symbol for white power.

The Anti-Defamation League (ADL) recently claimed the OK symbol means white power. Next week maybe they'll declare that a thumbs up means send all non-whites up to the moon.

anti-defamation league by Grandmaster Mac October 3, 2019