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Teaching Crabs How To Read 

Verb,

1. The action of teaching crabs how to read

2. The process by which crustaceans are made literate,

Both of these are considered Forbidden Knowledge of the highest order, and must never be spoken of, outside of complete secrecy. Many a fine man has fallen to the curiosity of teaching literacy to crabs, and have been executed or imprisoned- or worse- for their crimes.

Teaching crabs how to read is a gateway crime, in the ancient days, many of the most infamous dark lords used literate crabs as minions, for it allowed them to use more powerful and complex methods to expand their dominion over our small realm. In the darkest of days, crabs as big as houses would be sent in droves to raze cities, Whole countries were brought to their knees by the terrors wrought by the dark lords and their armies.

The last of the Literate Ones, as they are known by Crabfolk, was slain in AD 1356.

Ever since, the Crabfolk have lived in harmony with humankind.
Billy got burned at the stake for heresy!
I heard he was teaching crabs how to read!
Related Words

Crabs in the bucket 

People who are stuck in bad situations. Who drag you down with them

Comes from what happens when u place crabs in a bucket. One trys to escape the others grab their legs and try to escape so it ends up they all never get out.
Them people they just crabs in the bucket. U gotta get away from them
She looked so tan. But when she had her arms up, she had some serious cabes!
cabes by The Runs November 20, 2016

veal crates 

Several tiny cubicles crammed into one office as desks for graduate students. Like calves being fattened for slaughter, graduate students confined to veal crates can experience chronic stress so extreme as to require medication. Veal-crated students frequently drop our of graduate school after paying tuition for several years, thus helping to ensure that the university's coffers are filled while gaining nothing from the graduate experience but horrible memories and a few useless ideas.
Graduate Student: THIS is my office!!!?? I can't believe it; I'm a PhD student and this is supposed to be a great university. These cubicles are only four feet wide. I'll go insane.

Second Graduate Student: Welcome to the veal crates.
veal crates by ring-tailed roarer January 28, 2010
a person who jerks off under covers and chooses not to jerkoff with just his hand in his pantz
Jeb: thanks for takin all the covers Tito, well at leats i wont be a craber
Tito: huh?
craber by Craber101 March 18, 2005

Crabslap 

The act of slapping a sexual partner in the face with crab meat in a sexual manner.
After my anal discharge Hunter crabslaps me in the face.
Crabslap by Rageyy December 27, 2010
More from Urban Dictionary

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026

Northstarring

Finding your way back to the truth by fixing on one verified fact and working out from there, the way you navigate by the North Star when everything around you is spinning.
Rumours were flying everywhere, so she went northstarring — one checked fact at a time.
Northstarring by Light Bearer October 22, 2026
Word of the Day on October 23, 2026

Plate of Brown 

A plate of brown consists of foods that have little to no nutritional value, and are typically deep fried. A true plate of brown will also be accompanied by a dark soda.
Wanna go to meal hall & grab a plate of brown?
Plate of Brown by Cheddar Craigson September 18, 2020
Word of the Day on October 22, 2026

Larpenomics

When finance content creators rent out fancy cars and flex cash to seem richer than they really are in order to promote and sell their “get rich quick” courses.
Andrew Tate has mastered the field of larpenomics
Larpenomics by Rbois09 October 21, 2026
Word of the Day on October 21, 2026

Palmela Handerson 

Your hand that you masturbate with.
Girlfriend: What are you going to do for the next week while I'm on holiday?

Boyfriend: Have a visit from Palmela Handerson of course!
Word of the Day on October 20, 2026
Basically the same meaning as ate.
x:"Girl your fit chewed today!"
Chewed by iod1o March 30, 2022
Word of the Day on October 19, 2026
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