Male equivalent of pretending to orgasm or “faking it” — especially in a virtual environment.
CONGASMS occur after 20 minutes of failed attempts to jerk off your petite pornstar cock to an (often drunk, trans or fat) egirl you sexpested for half a day. Usually a congasm is preformed in order to spare your very satisfied partner from feelings of insecurity or suspicion.
This method can be a useful way to dispel rumours that you are actually a homosexual male living in New Zealand.
Named after famous kiwi troll and legendary discord playboy CONGASM who claims to have faked 90% of the hundreds of esex encounters they’ve had.
Person named Samir: “Did you just have esex with that tranny Laith?”
Person named Laith: “Don’t worry, I totally had to congasm after I realized they weren’t another man. I’ll die a virgin bro. Shiiiiet.”
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.
For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!