condolences window

The time period within which it is still reasonable to expect condolences for the death of a relative.

Dave: My uncle Pete died 5 years ago today.
Andy: Yeah, do you want to go to the pub tonight?
Dave: What the fuck, I just told you that my uncle Pete died.
Andy: Yeah, and?
Dave: Well, aren't you going to say "I'm sorry"?
Andy: Fuck that, 5 years is way outside the condolences window!

by Mentirosa August 6, 2011

Condolence High Five

Condolence high fives are no different from ordinary high fives, except that they are offered in condolence rather than in celebration.

Ted had the most horrible date; because Barney could relate to his sadness, he offered Ted a Condolence High Five.

by Solo Amadeus April 11, 2022

Consolences

Sympathy for a person who has a different video game console than your own.

Friend 1: "Oh, you have the Xbox One? My consolences."
Friend 2: "Shut up dude."
Friend 1: "I'm just saying I feel bad for you."

by AerPilot November 5, 2013

condolence

Pity for someone else's sorrow or loss; Sympathy.

After the sudden death of Princess Diana, thousands of messages of condolenc were sent to her family.

by Larstait November 10, 2003

Condolence-Five

The Condolence Five is given to whom something bad has happened.

Ian's friend get dumped so Ian gave his friend a "Condolence-Five"

by Quinnstefani December 3, 2014

condonlences

The art of double-speak where an organization or individual expresses sorrow at the misfortune of a person or group which they have actively opposed, while simultaneously implying their own moral or political judgment on the party/ies

Radical anti-abortion groups issued condonlences over the murder of Dr. George Tiller.

by jerryjack June 2, 2009

Condolencize

The act of expressing one’s sympathy towards another person

TJ: “Come on, man. Please just come to the funeral.”

Aaron: “No, dude. I’m not gonna condolencize your clearly neglected fish. Sure, it sucks for the fish, but you should’ve taken better care of it.”

by TheHumbleDesigner March 12, 2022