1. A person who takes more than 2 dumps daily and spending more than 30 minutes per time doing it.
2.Or somebody whose shit is the length of a Dole banana.
3. Or somebody whose shit looks like the dairy queen swirl cone. It was swirled to perfection.
You still in there?
Yes, I am.
Dude. You are the Crapmaster!
The master of a retard, as commonly seen in public schools since the initial passage of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act, which mandated the inclusion of retards into standard education settings. These retards need constant individual supervision from tardmasters.
"Dude, did you see that retard flip his shit in gym earlier? His tardmaster had to take him down!"
To make a stabbing motion towards your chest, directly over your heart. Named so, because it looks as though you are jerking off your heart's imaginary penis.