Bloomed

When your incompetent boss assigns you a pointless task for a scumbag client which your boss will either ignore or write off. The details of this kind of assignment (including the deadlines, specific tasks, and rationales) are usually extremely vague and involve ethically questionable activities. The assignment is typically so vague that one does not often know he has gotten Bloomed until the task is overdue.

Man, I think I got Bloomed this afternoon, but I'm pretty sure I'd be committing fraud if I went through with it. This assignment really Bloomed into an incomprehensible nightmare!

by GettinBloomed May 7, 2013

Bloomed

Smoke weed, then get the munchies and eat some magical mushrooms... may induce a bad trip man

"yo man, i was bloomed last night and i saw some crazy shit"
"oh shit man, shit be crazy when your doin crazy shit like getting bloomed or shrazed"

by Billbob Wierdo April 23, 2009

Bloomed

When you hit puberty

Omg dude your voice ! Have you bloomed

by Bigdickalez August 7, 2018

rate bloomer

Comes from Nex R’s song “Rate Bloomer”. This phrase refers to someone who was not liked or popular beforehand but is now the top dawg and is now someone that everybody likes and rates.

“Suddenly, they all rate me, I’m a rate bloomer!”

by yall cant handle this handle January 27, 2021

Bloomer

A mix of a realist and an optimist the Bloomer stands opposite to his doomer counterpart. The Bloomer, just as the doomer, sees the world for what it really is: messy, hard, unforgiving, selfish etc. They don't live in a bubble but see the harsh reality of this world. However, where the boomer falls into pessimism or nihilism and refuses to do anything about the situation but await the end, the Bloomer has a positive outlook. He accepts the rules of the game and in it tries to make something of himself. He also sees the good sides of life, wants to live a happy life and be successful.

*during the corona crisis*
Doomer: "look at all these selfish people. They sit at each others throats, act like idiots, the economy plummets... Society is doomed."
Bloomer: "Yeah, I know that there are lot of dumb people out there, but there are a lot of smart people too! And look at all the solidarity! We'll get through this mate, we'll get back into the world and start rebuilding. It'll all be fine."

by _TigerKing_ April 10, 2020

Bloomer Crickets

Bloomer Crickets are slang for Pubic Lice Infestation. Also called "crabs," pubic lice are parasitic insects found in the genital area of humans. Infection is common and found worldwide.

Pubic lice are usually spread through sexual contact. Rarely, infestation can be spread through contact with an infested person's bed linens, towels, or clothes. A common misunderstanding is that infestation can be spread by sitting on a toilet seat. This isn't likely, since lice cannot live long away from a warm human body. Also, lice do not have feet designed to walk or hold onto smooth surfaces such as toilet seats.

Infection in a young child or teenager may indicate sexual activity or sexual abuse.

Signs and symptoms of Bloomer Crickets include:
Itching in the genital area
Visible nits (lice eggs) or crawling lice

by Doug Hightower September 22, 2005

broken bloomer

A broken bloomer is a person whose been broken a lot of times and has real trust issues. A broken bloomer has a hard time in life and would die for people who wouldn’t care at all. The broken bloomer dreams of bright futures but has a hard time believing in them. Always wears a fake smile around people but is broken inside and it’s often seen on them.

Person 1: Hey you know that guy over there he seems a little weird often?
Person 2: Can’t you see he’s obviously a broken bloomer.
Person 1: What’s a broken bloomer?
Person 2: A broken bloomer is a broken person who wants people to be happy but really can’t be happy themselves and loves people that don’t care.
Person 1: Damn that’s hard.

by A real broken bloomer November 20, 2019