Stiffness

When a man's penis is erect during an important social function, causing great awkwardness and discomfort.
The man will then justify is awkward behavior in some far fetched way.

Person 1: Is anything ze matter, Sir Hilary?
Person 2: Just a slight stiffness coming on, due to the altitude, no doubt.

by Harder, daddy February 20, 2018

Stiffness scale

The ladies were talking and started discussing their mens stiffness scale. It measure the hardness of the stiffness. It goes from 1 to 5. 1 Means you have a softy problem or had way too much to drink. 5 mens you probably took 3 Viagra.

The guy was drunk and measure a 1 on the stiffness scale

by Qlesbo March 18, 2022

jahova's stiffness

An unwanted erection that surprises you at work, school, disney land, or any other public place. Not to be confused with a jahova's witness. (the annoying bastards that also surprise you and try to give you little bibles with pictures in them to make them more fun to look at, and not read)

Dude, i got jahova's stiffness at disney world when i got on the Peter Pan Ride.

by joe joe the circus clown November 8, 2009

Jehovah's stiffness

n. An unwelcome erection which arrives at the most inconvenient times and is hard to get rid of.

E.g. Yo Tony blud, lessons over, lets split.

Tony: Shit! I can't stand up, I got Jehovah's stiffness init!

by swany01 May 14, 2008

travel stiffness

The unconscious act of Male arousal through the monotonous motion of a motorised vehicle or The vibration of the motor felt though the seat of the vehicle.

The vibration from the motor of the bus gave Gabriel a case of travel stiffness.

by Bubbles91 October 20, 2015

Jehovah's Stiffness

A Jehovah's Stiffness is a completely unwanted erection that appears at the worst of all times and once it appears, it absolutely refuses to go away for a VERY long time.

In reference to a Jehovah's Witness

For example getting a Jehovah's Stiffness on the bus or train just before your stop and you have to stand up and walk away but you know you can't is really annoying

by Stu Marble December 23, 2007

morning stiffness

When you wake up with an erection.

Today I woke up with morning stiffness.

by Guy Reynolds September 5, 2006