Shank Monkey

A common Rhesus Monkey, jacked up on steroids and amphetamines with its hands sawed off and surgically replaced by retractable switch blades.
Often used by mad scientists as an outer security measure in their forest bound secret lairs.

Get the fuck out before I set the Shank Monkeys on you!

by yeti_detective September 8, 2010

Spank Monkey

Someone who's life has been consumed by internet porn, and they spend all their time beating off in front of the computer.

Tommy turned into a spank monkey when his family got high speed internet service.

by Willey P September 20, 2007

strangling the stank monkey

When you stop showering for 3 or more days but still masturbate despite the awful smell of your genitals

Dude I haven't showered in a week, but I'm being brave and strangling the stank monkey twice a day.

by Big Ebs February 15, 2014

Spank Monkey

A frenzied practitioner of consensual BDSM involving repetitive blows ("spanks") rained down upon the voluntarily uplifted bottom. By extension, someone who can't stop talking about this hobby.

Suzeemoon much enjoyed being disciplined by her Cariad using well-judged slaps upon her gluteus maxima - in fact, she was an incorrigible Spank Monkey.

by NickCosmoSonde October 5, 2008

Skank Monkey

Chimpanzee of Swahili decent known for its boob jobs, giant lips, the starting of AIDS, high heels, drunkedness, highness, and skirts.

Skank monkeys can be found whoring in almost every town in South America and Nebraska. There have been some reports of rouge skank monkeys in places such as China, Russia, England, and Italy.

dude i need to get laid

i know what to do

what?

get a skank monkey!!!

we dont live in nebraska...

oh yeah.

by Howie II January 17, 2008

stank monkey

An old, dirty, oftentimes poor black man who reeks of piss, alcohol, dookie, and/or weed. Usually seen accompanied by a bottle wrapped in a brown paper sack. Also called "stunk monkey."

First White Guy: *sniff* Ew! What's that smell?
Second White Guy: It's that goddamned stank monkey over there!
First White Guy: He smells like dog shit!
Stank Monkey: Shut the hell up you dumb crackers!

by The Protagonist August 22, 2005

Skank Monkey

An individual that enjoys being slapped in various non-sexual areas with male genetalia.

Dude, Sheila is such a skank monkey, she asked me to whack her in the forehead with it like four times.

by Ricky Bobby rumplestillskin August 19, 2011