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Optical Rectalitis 

Where your head is so far up your ass you have a shitty outlook on life.
With his recent string of bad luck, Richard suffers from an acute case of Optical Rectalitis.

Cranial Rectimitus 

The serious medical condition where the sufferer is known to have their head lodged firmly and permanently up their own ass. Symptoms are readily apparent in the patient's behavior and verbal interactions.
Ross' behavior was nigh on inexplicable... the only possible explantion for his asinine behavior was a terminal case of Cranial Rectimitus.
Cranial Rectimitus by Tron Engewar February 3, 2008

rectilinear 

Pertaining to the measurement of one's asshole.
After a vigorous session of anal sex, Bob's anus had expanded to 3 rectilinear inches.
rectilinear by C.S. Lewis Jr. September 4, 2004

REPTILITIS 

A disease that manifests itself with the same symptoms as the common cold but is really a virus spread by contact with snakes and lizards.
Your co-worker who owns a ridiculous number of snakes and lizards and is always coughing and sneezing has reptilis.
REPTILITIS by Anonymous222 May 9, 2005

REPTILITIS 

What you suffer from after making out with someone who is afflicted with this reptile virus
Enjoying a heavy make out session when you suddenly feel like you are making out with an alligator because they are eating your face alive and their body gestures are that of an alligator during a feeding frenzy
REPTILITIS by Lisa March 7, 2005

Rectilinear distance 

The gayest distance between any two points on a grid.
Josh: Hey what's the rectilinear distance from here to Taco Bell?
Andy: Shut up, fag.
Rectilinear distance by superjoe30 September 25, 2009
More from Urban Dictionary

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
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