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portch-monkey 

1. Damn lazy portch-monkey go play outside. 2. Go pick some cotton portch-monkey.
portch-monkey by Chris Tortora July 29, 2006

Portchester Slam 

When you're fucking a girl doggy style and about to cum you pull out and jizz on your hand while spitting on the girls back. When she turns around thinking you jizzed on her back you belt her with the cum-hand.
1) I was in westchester and she a hoe so she got a port chester slam.

2) Guy A) Did you hear that sound?
Guy B) Yeah Mike Portchester slammed Grace, you could hear it for miles!
Portchester Slam by Chris DP3 October 13, 2010

portch-monkey 

portch-monkey by n00b August 23, 2003
port-ch

...a three sided enclosure ...usually attached to the front of dey crib
...can also be used as a monkey enclosure
Yall wanna chill on the portch
portch by #thiglife February 16, 2019

Portch Back Syndrome 

The result of an obese individual whose fat is so grotesque and exaggerated that it literally defies gravity creating a portch structure on their back region, in which various table items can be placed. The syndrome also known as hotel fat may ressemble homeless German children and occurs dominantly in American pigs.

Symptoms of progressive Portch Back Syndrome may include but is not limited to: hippo wings, massive appetite, social alienation, fridge full of hot pockets, a strong resemblance to Rosie O'Donald, a tendancy to be a pedophile and waddling walking disorder.
"Where's my drink? I left it right here on the portch"
"Dude we're nowhere near a portch, that was a chick with portch back syndrome!"

The other day I saw this girl with portch back syndrome and she unknowingly stole a whole fridge with her back fat!

Sometimes portch back syndrome is a good thing, now I can hold 8 things at once!

Portachub 

A penis that is not quite at full Chubb status but stiffness is apparent. Also a way of referencing the penis as a piece of meat. Hence the word"Porter".
Amy's not that hot, but that ass is giving me a straight portachub.

The disappointment on Stephanie's face was apparent when I couldn't get hard and I could only serve up the portachub.....
Portachub by Rightnerface October 28, 2016