Portraity 

A selfie portrait that is artistic, (high art )in nature.

ArtistCaroleJMcCoy creates portraity selfies, that are artistic in nature , not just your regular duck mouth poochy selfie.

Portraity by Artist Writer Carole J McCoy January 29, 2021

Portrait of Markov 

A book that the girl "Yuri" reads you in the game Doki Doki Literature club, which is about said by Yuri in Act 1 "Basically, it's about this girl in high school who moves in with her long-lost sister... But as soon as she does so, her life gets really strange. She gets targeted by these people who escaped from a human experiment prison. But in Act 2 she says more and she has to say this "Basically, it's about this religious camp that was turned into a human experiment prison... And the people trapped there have this trait that turns them into killing machines that lust for blood. But the facility gets even worse, and they start selectively breeding people by cutting off their limbs and affixing them.

Yuri pulled the book out of her backpack called The Portrait Of Markov.

Portrait of Markov by Somebody that likes money June 5, 2018

faux-portunity 

It's presented kinda like an opportunity, but there's always a catch, which is usually a demand for something you're not really comfortable doing, which would usually require great effort and commitment on your part, and would really only serve to make the other person look good (and probably momentarily at that). Oh, and you can't get the opportunity part unless you agree to the catch, so it's basically a hustle. Usually a faux-portunity is followed by a hyped-up promise that can never be delivered. In other words, it's a complete waste of your time.

I thought he was offering me the real deal, but it was just a faux-portunity.

faux-portunity by rockstarawesome June 10, 2009

portrait 

A crafted photograph of an individual. The image must be an experience of the person telling a story and giving the viewer information about the person. Shopping mall photo stores rarely take the time to create a portrait. Those businesses make template shots of humans. They all look the same, but people are not!

Jim had known Melody for years. He knew everything about her. Over time he created a portrait of her in his mind that he was ready to develop.

portrait by Marc Dunegan November 29, 2007

Paint your own portrait 

For a gentleman to attempt to cum in his own face...

Technique - lie on your back with a pillow behind your head. With a rolling motion bring your knees as far back towards your head as possible (you may hold your legs with your free arm) Point and shoot...

Good luck and make sure the door is locked

Mike: "I am bored"

Lee: "You could always pop into the other room and try to paint your own portrait?"

Mike: "Good idea - I think I shall..."

Paint your own portrait by Mickey Rawlins October 1, 2009

self-portraitographer 

Someone who takes pictures of them self a lot, especially in the mirror at weird angles, making peace signs and "cute" faces

90% of the people on myspace, photobucket, facebook, etc. are self-portraitographers

self-portraitographer by x0supercool0x February 10, 2008

portrait of a blank slate 

absolute fucking banger by lovejoy

person 1: "did you hear Lovejoy's new song, portrait of a blank slate?"
person 2: "Yeah it's such a banger innit"

portrait of a blank slate by Extreme wilbur soot simp #real October 6, 2023