If you don't know where you stand with somebody, I'd say your moral compass isn't the only one that needs repairs.
Alan- I don't know where I stand with you boss.
Dave- The same place you were standing a minute ago Alan, you're standing directly in front of me, so until you choose a new set of coordinates that is where you stand with me. What is the misunderstanding here?
Messunderstanding is a definition for a misunderstanding but with text messages. As for example a text message intended to be funny or ironic but instead, in the hands of the reciever reads as an insult or is taken too seriously. The misunderstanding is directly linked to the forum of the communication. In ordinary spoken conversation, a weird comment followed by a smile helps the other participant to understand the irony, whereas in text messages it can be misunderstood or - messunderstood.
People avoid messunderstandings by using or not using smileys and/or other stuff.
"James thought he actually could ride in the car with me even though I said no. Why did I put a smiley there? Clearly this was a messunderstanding. I was messunderstood!"
When male virgin thinks he’s gonna get laid, but he gets his ass ripped.
Hej Vojta, how was your first sex with Zuzka?
Well it was first sex misunderstanding. It was more like fist sex and I can’t even sit down properly because my ass is inside out.
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).