literality
The quality or condition of being afflicted with a terminal inability to read-between-the-lines and only comprehend concepts and situations in a strict non-figurative sense.
She: “Hey sexy let’s go knock boots.”
He: “What do you mean?”
She: “Why don’tcha marinate the nether rod in the squish mitten…”
He: "You wanna what?"
She: “Wanna ‘Wham’ your ‘Oingo Boingo’ into my ‘Velvet Underground’?”
He: “Huh?”
She: “Come take the love luge on the inbound loin line”
He: “Pardon?”
She: “Tiptoe through my two lips…?”
He: “Ummm…I’m lost”
She: “Your literality drives me nuts...grab some imagination and gimme’ a clunge-plunge already!”
He: “What do you mean?”
She: “Why don’tcha marinate the nether rod in the squish mitten…”
He: "You wanna what?"
She: “Wanna ‘Wham’ your ‘Oingo Boingo’ into my ‘Velvet Underground’?”
He: “Huh?”
She: “Come take the love luge on the inbound loin line”
He: “Pardon?”
She: “Tiptoe through my two lips…?”
He: “Ummm…I’m lost”
She: “Your literality drives me nuts...grab some imagination and gimme’ a clunge-plunge already!”
literality by KissMyKooch June 15, 2009
