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Who's Kavian? Simply put, a God among men, the future ruler of the world, and a fine pimp that ain't afraid to slap you across the face with his cock.

It is said that when He was born, color was given to the world and two neighboring stars exploded; ushering in the greatest era in human history.

Kavian was a creation of "The Force". When created, he weighed about a stunning 21 lbs (12 lbs was his penis alone). Without parents or guidance, He was raised by a pack of wild wolves, named Alpha-Wolf at age 3, and solved a rubix cube underwater blindfolded at age 3-AND-A-HALF.

His middle name is "Ballsacko-Grande", Swahili for "The-Chosen-One". In 1996, He was named heir to Swaziland's thrown and led them to unknown advancements in medical science and geography.

After his single-handed victory of World War II, Kavian was named "The Jesus" by the Tibetan Monks. His title signified Him as being the one to bring balance to the elements of the world.

Kavian is a man known for his kindness. Back in Nam' He created the "I have a Dream" speech for his boy, Martin Luther King, Jr. He took no credit in creating it. Later, he hunted down the man responsible for MLK's (AKA Big Daddy Martin) assassination and brutally killed the man.

No mercy.

"The-Most-Interesting-Man-In-The-World" relinquished his position to Kavian.

So next time you're down at the lowest point in your life ask yourself this: "What would Kavian do." Either way, you probably wont be able to do what He would do.
"Kavian died five years ago, but Death is to afraid to tell him."
~J.F.K

"Kavian's tears cure cancer... to bad he never cries."
~Django

"Kavian counted to infinity... twice."
~Tupac

"Kavian is the reason Waldo is hiding."
~New York Times
Kavian by Swag-Yolo420Blaze May 8, 2013
Related Words
Kaigan is a very loud out going person, she’s never shy. SHES SO Beautiful But can be a bitch sometimes 😂
Kaigan’s a lovely bitch
kaigan by 12627 July 31, 2019
A name given to the most beautiful and amazing girl ever. She's is generally perfect in every single way and will remain by your side no matter what. Through think or thin, Katigans will always be the most amazing girlfriends/bestfriends in your life.
Boy 1: Hey, I've got the most amazing girlfriend in the world!

Boy 2: Really? What's her name?

Boy 1: Katigan, duh.
Katigan by Duckie~M July 25, 2011
this name is Quite unique. The Name kaviana suits an amazing person. she is there for you when you need her but she’s a Hella Crazy. Like she’ll Do sum of u say she won’t or is a pussy. she’s CRAZY but really Fun
Kaviana you tryna share yo food
kaviana by Stefanieee314 May 2, 2019
A Karigan is very beautiful and pretty. Karigans are also very athletic. They are also the best friends to have. They are soooo sweet and kind but if u cross them, just don't, if you have a Karigan as a friend or best friend KEEP her. You will regret it if you loose her. Karigans are harsh sometimes but remember they are just telling the truth even if it is brutal. She cares alot about everything. She is very smart. She can do so many things it would make you jelous.
Karigan pernounced care-again
karigan by April😊 September 21, 2017
The perfect girlfriend. And a total sweetheart. She's everything you'd ever want in a woman, and more.

The most beautiful girl you'd ever lay eyes on. She has great hair, and she's not afraid to flaunt it.
If looks could kill, you'd die after a fraction of a glance at her perfection.

She's a very honest person, and she'll speak her mind. She's always right, so arguing with her is pointless.

Kavian never backs down from a challenge, but you'd regret challenging her. Underestimating her will ultimately lead to your doom.

Symptoms of contact with Kavian for an extended period of time include a loss of feelings for anyone else, increased heart rate, dizziness, insomnia and excessive fantasizing.

One of the funniest people you'll ever know. Kavian has a great sense of humor.
She can cheer up just about anyone.

The one that puts all of your exes to shame. Her amazing personality and dazzling features are second to none, so always keep a can opener handy. You never know when you'll need to open up a can of whoop-ass on whoever it is that tries to flirt with her.

However, she's no pushover and can easily beat them up herself. Or you, for that matter.

Kavian is extremely loyal and would do anything for the people she cares about.
She'll stick with you through thick and thin.

The most constant and abundant source of happiness on Earth.
You'll be smiling the whole time she's around. If you're lucky enough to be with her, never let her go.
She's definitely a keeper.
Kavian is just so perfect.

Dang, I wish I had a girlfriend like Kavian.

Back off, bro. Kavian is mine.
Kavian by KavianIsMine September 10, 2013
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