The stupid round cartoon that makes me want to take the newspaper and tear it up and light it on fire and feed the ashes to my dog. Preaches good "Christian" values such as mispronouncing words, leaving dotted lines behind when you walk, and having creepy dead grandpa ghosts. The characters consist of about 18 moronic kids that are pretty much clones of each other. The writer's like three centuries old and he needs to die.

Claire: What do you have against the Family Circus?
Todd: Okay, you sit down to read your paper, and you're enjoying your entire two-page comic spread, right? And then there's the Family fucking Circus, bottom right hand corner, just waiting to suck. And it's the last thing you read, so it spoils everything you read before it.
Claire: You could just not read it.
Todd: I hate it, yet I'm uncontrollably drawn to it.

The Family Circus by latin guy March 20, 2005

Related Words

Family circus • The Family Circus • family • family guy • family jewels • family reunion • family values • family circle • Family Man • Family Pack

The Family Circus

A seriously douchey and unfunny family-oriented comic strip drawn by octogenarian cartoonist Bil Keane. The strip centers around a fat little fuck named Billy and his three equally piggish younger siblings as they share unremarkable childish insight and tromp around their all-white, middle class, God-fearing suburbia. It also features two parents that are even more bland than their kids and usually fade into the woodwork.

Highlights of the strip include special extra-shitty-artwork "Drawn by Billy" days, and cameos by creepy ghostly apparitions of dead grandparents and pranksters. On weekdays, the strip is usually limited to one round panel of treacly shit, though this may be split into two halves for extra-profound occasions. Weekend strips may feature multiple panels of warm gooey shit, or a full-panel expose on the children's autistic romps through their backyard.

The Family Circus has been in continuous production for over 40 years, yet inexplicably remains the most widley syndicated comic strip in the world. Likely supported by nostalgic grandparents who crave wholesome, meaningless fluff in their funnies. See Peanuts.

ACTUAL SAMPLE DIALOUGE FROM RECENT STRIPS OF THE FAMILY CIRCUS (SERIOUSLY):
Billy: Would it be against the rules to put two kinds of cereal in one bowl? (5/30/06)
Dolly: The rainbow is Mother Nature's way of saying she's sorry for the bad storm. (5/17/06)
Jeffy: Know what Daddy? I could pick up this rock if it wasn't so heavy. (5/16/06)
P.J.: *shits self*
Reader: *vomits*

The Family Circus by Compdude September 1, 2008

The Family Circus

A retarded cartoon made by a stupid person.

"The Family Circus is really stupid"

The Family Circus by Deadlyhomsar October 4, 2003

Whale

In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.

"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."

Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020

Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.

Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.

Concrete cowboy by EugeneJohnson42000 March 16, 2024

Word of the Day on September 20, 2026

hobo loko

any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear

hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh

hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026

Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".

Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."

God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011

Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.

Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?

city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006

Word of the Day on September 17, 2026

Is that cake?

Another way to say is this fake? Like the show real or cake

“Slayyyter just announced another album last night”
“No way, is that cake?”
“Yeah whoops this isn’t real”

Is that cake? by Sexyyred September 15, 2026

Word of the Day on September 16, 2026