Calpet 

A slap behind the head, usually for being stupid.

A swift calpet to regain his focus was all it took.

Calpet by 🌴ЯIПI FᄂΛVΛ July 17, 2024

Carpet python 

The dick of a couch.

Look, I’m not trying to yuck anyone’s yum here if you’re all wild about carpet pythons, I just wanna sit.

Carpet python by Skyfire1228 June 16, 2018

carpet munchies 

A heightened desire to perform cunnilingus following inhalation or ingestion of delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol, the psychoactive compound in cannabis sativa.

Colloquially: really wanting to "eat pussy" after smoking marijuana.

Man, I was watching a movie with my girl the other night and after my second or third bong rip I really got the carpet munchies... dog I went down on her for like an hour!

carpet munchies by DJ Silky Nick November 2, 2011

Carpet Blowout 

A phrase allegorious to the term "sausage-fest", only refering to women.

"Hey Becky, want to split this joint? It is such a Carpet Blowout in here"

Carpet Blowout by Sivart Ferguson February 9, 2010

name carpetbombing

excessive name dropping, a combination of name dropping and carpet bombing

Person one: "And then the President said, and then Micheal Jordan said and then Lagerfeld showed up, George Clooney said hello to me, Dan Rather was like, oh my God, and then there was Tom Cruise, Meryl Streep, Tom Brokaw, The Queen of England, Mayor Bloomberg.."

Person two: "Shut up."

Person one: "Why?"

Person two: "You're name carpetbombing."

name carpetbombing by AYYFRON April 24, 2011

Carpet Match the Drapes

Term used when someone is asking whether a person's pubic hair color matches the color of the hair on their head. This question is usually asked of a person with red hair.

Hey Charlie, I saw you went home with that cute redheaded chick from the bar last night. Did the carpet match the drapes?

Carpet Match the Drapes by Midnight310 August 16, 2011

Roll out the pink carpet

To offer sex as a form of gratitude or atonement.

As gratitude:

Jeff: "I helped your sister get her car out of a snow bank last night"

Mike: "Thanks dude, that's cool of you"

Jeff: "No need to thank me, she rolled out the pink carpet"

Mike: "What?!"

As atonement:

Jeff: "Fern borrowed my new car and scratched the damn paint!"

Mike: "Did she roll out the pink carpet?"

Jeff: "Damn right she did!"

Roll out the pink carpet by UncleJeffy February 3, 2010