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Authorities

Friend: dude I've been watching this hot girl on webcam. I think she's about to start stripping!
Me: Damn! Let me know when she does so I can report it to the "authorities".
Friend: are you talking about your junk again?
Me: Hellz yeah!
by Urbandictionaryarab April 1, 2017
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alphabetical authorities

Da "top people" whom folks consult for advice/assistance on a variety of ordinary topics dat are randomly scattered about over da "ol' 26" in da English language.
Da seven most common types of alphabetical authorities are:
(1) hexpert --- someone who is super-familiar with voodoo and curses; hopefully he uses said vast witchcraft-knowledge to remove or alleviate said evil spells, not to put them on in da first place!
(2) mexpert --- an individual well-versed in all matters "south of da border".
(3) pexpert --- a plumber who is well-versed in da use of freeze-resistant plastic piping
(4) rexpert --- a learned bookworm on da subject of certain animals, either man's best friend or da huge hunched-over carnivores back in da Jurassic period.
(5) sexpert --- someone who can advise couples on achieving more satisfying intimacy.
(6) texpert --- a dude who knows all about da "black-tea"-rich southern-USA area dat is Ranger Walker's usual stompin' grounds.
(7) vexpert --- a human-nature guru with extensive experience on what pushes people's buttons; again --- as in da first example above --- presumably he uses said know-how to help **reduce** already-existing frustration/distress in others, not to purposely exhibit destructive behavior dat would cause people to **become** wound up when they had felt reasonably calm before! (Da infamous "gettin', getters, got"exchange between Madea and Dr. Phil comes to mind.)
by QuacksO February 7, 2020
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authoritye

ALSO SEE: authoritah

Something the South Park fat kid bully character, Eric Cartman, envies as he role plays a mirror-sunglassed megalomaniac law enforcement ... pig.
OFFICER/DEPUTY CARTMAN: "Aah am a cop! And you wheel RESPECT my AUTHORITYE !!"
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Authorititties

The phenomenon when men will do anything a woman wants due to her breasts. In this situation, the woman has authorititties.
Girl: "Hey, can you hold this for a minute?"
Guy 1: "Sure"
Guy 2: "Dude, I know she has authorititties but still..."
by witmaster flash July 19, 2011
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authoritea

1. Tea for anyone who believes that violence can be used to solve complex {social} issues.
2. Tea for authoritative leaders or parents.
3. Tea for an author.
person one: would you like some authoritea?
person two: no thanks, I like green tea better, and I dont subscribe to that ideology...

...and my writing is horrible.
by cyberphunkisms January 6, 2010
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Authoritized

When you wear shoes with heals that make you extra tall. You aquire the power of authority over your peers, co-workers and even boss (b/c you tower over them).
If you don't get back to doing emails you WILL be authoritized so help me!!
by Raejoy November 9, 2009
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