Asshanded 

The past tense description of having your ass handed to you.

Frequently used in spofo, a sports forum on craigslist, or its' evil twisted product of incest step sister: forum 1006

Dude, you just got asshanded, AGAIN.

Well, we asshanded the "Trifecta" yet again today, you can tell when he starts posting more and more.

Why does Inshannityboi keep telling me I'm asshanded, when all I said was hello?

Asshanded by trollertroller December 8, 2011

Asshands 

Using a woman's ass cheeks to get yourself off.

Ellena was a bit too fat for me to bang, but I flipped her over and pulled an asshands on her.

Asshands by tdelano April 8, 2009

having your ass handed to you 

Getting completely, utterly and totally beaten, defeated and crushed at a game, challenge or debate. Often computer based. Can be extended through the phrase "... on a plate"

When playing Halo 3, there was nothing more embarrassing for Duncan than having his ass handed to him by his girlfriend

"Matt, having your ass handed to you a couple of times can teach you a little humility"

having your ass handed to you by Ribz December 10, 2007

Asshands 

n) A condition caused by digging ones hands into feces or by actually sticking one's hands into an ass. (n) A person who has done either of these things.

I got asshands trying to get that cow shit out of my dog's mouth.

Dammit. Asshands is here. Hide the good bathroom soap.

Asshands by Jackpott September 6, 2020

ass handed 

when someone gets completely smoked or destroyed, you say they got their asses handed to them.

The Ottawa Senators got their asses handed to them 9-0.

ass handed by matt February 5, 2004

asshattedness 

Being an Asshat about something

see also asshat

My boss has the same characteristics of an asshat - he displays asshattedness.

asshattedness by crispey May 27, 2006

Assanged 

To be Assanged

1. When you are attacked on charges that you cannot immediately disprove and are forced to hide, in ways that reinforce misguided public perceptions of you, to the advantage of your detractors, you've been Assanged.

2. Broader definition: If you have strong publicly voiced ethics and you fight against the corruption and the questionable ethos that pervades large 21st Century institutions and, as a result of not being able to target you legally, your name and your associations are muddied through impressive - if childish and easily scripted - misinformation campaigns, possibly involving all the four estates, and you are forced to disprove ambiguous charges and rumors that were orchestrated primarily to tarnish your profile and distract the mob from the truth, you've been Assanged.

Named after Julian Assange, one of the founders and most prominent spokesperson of whistle-blower website Wikileaks. Mr. Assange is most famously associated with the release of several large collections of internal US government documents regarding the Afghan and Iraq wars, and also US State Department internal cables. In the free-thinking community, Mr. Assange is more widely known for founding a website that made its claim to fame by releasing documents that embarrassed many non-American governments and corporations.

1. You point at the burning roof; the serial arsonist points at your dirty shoes; the mob attacks you for the shoes instead of putting the fire out, thus forcing you to hide while still pointing at the burning roof. You've been Assanged.

Assanged by nostraticispeak December 2, 2010