Skip to main content

What the Monk 

A replacement for "what the fuck" after a long night of D2ing it at Tophers
"What the monk is goin on, that guy is wearing Sorels in the monkin bar"
What the Monk by MargandMir January 16, 2005
Urban Dictionary Merch

what the monk 

usually the beginning of an appeal when someone has brought false charges up against your monkey
What? the monk? why the fuck would he steal your apples, mr. shitt? he eats fucking bananas.
what the monk by marcopolio January 27, 2005

What the Monkey! 

“What the Monkey!” is an expression which can be applied to almost any situation. It is not a question, it is a statement. Something like "What the F'"but to avoid cursing. "What the Monkey" is an expression usually when you are describing some kind of accident or surprise that had happened but it's funny. Like you watch some Funny Home Video about a guy trying to make a dive in the pool but the board broke or a cows trying to chase after you and make love.
Mary: "Hey, Kevin passed out last night and they stuck a carrot in his nose and a Pineapple on his head. Then they took pictures"
Peter: "Hahaha...What the Monkey!"

Wes: "What the Monkey!! Who the heck threw my underwear on the chandelier?"
What the Monkey! by Bard777 August 2, 2011

what the monkey 

An expression of shock pioneered in West Sussex churches as a way to avoid swearing when surprised. Has now spread and is a general phrase used when shocked. Can be shortened for instant messaging to WTM.
"Johnny, I'm pregnant."
"What the monkey!?"

What the H Monkey??

a word when said if confused and has nothing better to say

created by Blair Bear of the 727 bizz-itchess
Bob- "Fuck yo couch!!!"

Blair Bear- "What the H Monkey??"

What The Flaming Fudge Monkeys 

Abbreviated as 'WTFFM'

A way to show enormous frustration without actually cursing. Taking from the popular acronym WTF.
Friend: "You do know that she's cheating on you right?"

You: "What The Flaming Fudge Monkeys man! You better be kidding!"

Friend: "Sorry dude, but it is true."

You: "Argh!"

Give the monkey what she wants 

To put forth the necessary effort to ensure the satisfaction of all involved parties in a particular situation.
“This presentation needs to be perfect, or my boss is going to be up my ass crack without a paddle. I’m really going to have to give the monkey what she wants, or I’ll be out of a job faster than you can say ‘Can you lend a coworker a pencil?’”
More from Urban Dictionary

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026
Next