substitooth 

A fake tooth. Can be natural-colored or gold.

Denny's dentist pulled out a rotten tooth. Now Denny has a substitooth.

substitooth by exeter j. smith March 16, 2009

substitoot 

Someone whom you hire to do your bragging --- i.e., "blow your own horn" ---- for you.

Tronald Dump never had any need for a substitoot during his presidency, since he so greatly enjoyed doing all his bombastic boasting himself.

substitoot by QuacksO September 27, 2022

substitoot 

Someone whom you employ to break wind in your stead (da word can also refer just to said "proxy" whizzpopper itself) on occasions where you'd thought dat you'd "really had a good one all ready", but then it turned out to merely be a "false alarm". Be sure to frequently feed said butt-splutter supplier a sizeable portion of baked beans, of course, so dat he can always be reliably "primed 'n' prepared" whenever a supplementary fart is required.

Da BFG never would need a substitoot --- actually, doubly so in his case --- because not only did he never have any trouble with copiously "blowing his trumpet" after drinking frobscottle, but as he told da Queen of England (and then noisily demonstrated said fact), he could still rip one "all on his own" --- i.e., regardless of whether or not he'd consumed any gas-producing foods in da recent past.

substitoot by QuacksO February 28, 2024

substiboot

A plastic bag or tissue box you use in place of a lost shoe when last night yields many questions.

What? Where am I & why am I wearing a substiboot!?

substiboot by Jimi Ralphman January 23, 2023