"Shut the hell up before I shove a cactus so far up your ass you'll have more pricks in your mouth than your father had on Pride's Month," said little Jimmy "Damn, little Jimmy, you need to chill out," said his bully, getting out the gasoline and matches."
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.