female rationalization hamster

Rationalization Hamster - It is a creature that inhabits the female brain and helps them spin out rationalizations when they get into a predicament. When faced with a a dilemma, the female brain that houses the rationalization hamster, causes the hamster to start working by jumping on its wheel and running really hard. In the process it spins out a rationalization – an excuse, that absolves the woman of the blame and predicates it upon farcical self- justification.

Female - I know it is not his baby, but if I don't tell him that, it's not actually a lie. After all, I won't be hurting his feelings.

Guy - Wow! So you believe it's not a lie when you make him falsely believe that the child is his, and hide the fact that you lied to and cheated on him?

Female - It just happened like that. I was heavily drunk and was not thinking clearly. So it's not my fault, you see.

Guy - Damn, that female rationalization hamster must be working overtime!

female rationalization hamster by DDwd5 February 23, 2014

rationalization hamster 

The rationalization hamster is a legendary creature dwelling deep in the minds of the self-delusional, and is particularly common among young liberal women. From birth, the rationalization hamster enters a symbiotic relation with its host, whereby whenever the host feels a craving to do something completely insane and malicious that will have horrible consequences for everyone in the long run, the rationalization hamster will jump on its wheel and run really, really fast, getting the magical hamster wheel to spin out a long sheet of paper full of neat rationalizations for the ultimately devastating action.

Rationalization hamsters are thought to be a key component in producing liberal scholarly works, particularly those of feminism. Young, liberated women often rely on it to explain their attraction to the asshole who is going to pump and dump them, as well as their contempt for the nice guy who, unaware of the hamster within, strives fruitlessly to gain their true love. Older, liberated women also rely on it for dumping their husbands and using the resulting child support money on jewellery, cars and/or crack.

The adulterer: Well, it's okay to lie about cheating on him and say it's his baby, as long as his feelings aren't hurt!

Some dude: Whoa, you think it's okay to lie, cheat and commit paternity fraud on your man? Your rationalization hamster must be working overtime!

The adulterer: But it's not my fault I slept around, it kinda just happened! And those guys probably raped me because I don't really like them right now anymore...

Some dude: Hot dang, that's one tough hamster!

rationalization hamster by rampaging teddybear of wub December 14, 2012

rationalize 

to make excuses by masking own flaws/insecurities by explaining one's own reasoning/actions, often used to avoid the real reason or reality when all it does it make one small, simple & scared.

Joe: Bill why did you beat that guy up?
Bill: cuz he flirted with my girlfriend dude.
Joe: Umm, he was just asking where a store is.
Bill: Well, I had to protect her honor & defend her, besides he looked shifty.
Joe: You're just doing nothing but rationalize.

rationalize by fballjones October 12, 2010

rationality 

see logical.
The ability to reason. A quality lacking in most. A good rule of thumb is, those who claim to be rational are the least rational. Virtually non-existant in political circles worldwide. While not important to happiness, the world needs rational people to function. No one knows why.

Hey man, i'm the most rational mofo in here.
Oh no you ain't.

rationality by Moses June 16, 2004

Reverse Rationalism

Reverse Rationalism is a stance which is practically incomprehensible that seeks to be the opposite of what classical rationalism is about, it coniders atheism, anti-theism, laicism, state atheism, scientism, materialism, physicalism, positivism/empirism and naturalism as being irrational while it considers theism, anti-atheism, anti-anti-theism, discidism, state spiritualism, state religion, theocracy, anti-scientism / extrascientism, anti-materialism / extramaterialism, extraphysicalism, post-positivism / post-empirism, spiritualism, spirituality, religion, esoterism, occultism and supernaturalism as being rational, it basically believes that everything considered as irrational by reverse rationalism should be countered while everything considered as rational by reverse rationalism should be promoted and even encouraged.

"Reverse Rationalism makes sense, somehow, if we consider what people like the ones on RationalWiki and on Quora actually do, and how several spiritual, esoteric and occultist groups have a lot of good explanations about reality and existence as well."

Reverse Rationalism by Full Monteirism April 22, 2021

Rationalized Distancing 

During the COVID-19 pandemic, when you see your friends or family members who don’t live under your roof either one-on-one or in groups whether it be standing 6 feet apart from each other and not moving from that spot, meeting in cars in the parking lot, walking or riding bikes together on opposite sides of the street, or holding exercise classes in the street. These people are practicing creative distancing, but it is slightly different because people who practice rationalized distancing think it’s okay because they list the precautions they had taken and will argue with those who don’t agree with them—it was only five minutes, they sat 6 feet apart, we monitored their behavior, it was just a playdate, the only other place we go is the grocery store, I’m healthy, we’re all healthy. However, according to MIT research “mucus and saliva can burst from a person’s mouth at nearly a hundred miles an hour and travel as far as 27 feet.” This method of distancing is flawed, selfish, and breaks all social distancing rules.

Joe met up with his two brothers at his house and practiced rationalized distancing by saying it was okay because they only met for 10 minutes. Now, all three brothers and their entire families have Coronavirus.

Rationalized Distancing by Macblue April 23, 2020

Rationalship 

Noun. rash-un-all-ship
1. A sound, rational emotional involvement

2. A reciprocal connection that is free from the following possible side effects of a Relationship: drama, hang-ups, indecision, apathy, cheating, unrest/irritability, irregular bleeding, weight gain/loss, hair loss, STDs, unexpected pregnancy, drug addiction, workaholism, stalking, mood swings, mania, depression, gossip, job loss, irrational geographic relocation, marginalization, loss of skin elasticity or various personal belongings and dignity.

3. Evolutionary stage of human connection and/or personal development which follows the earlier relationship stage

I started dating my smart, healthy, hot, and available good friend of six years when I was 33 and thus began my first Rationalship.

Rationalship by Rational Person December 18, 2012