oyster bed

A bed, mattress, futon or even a blanket or sleeping bag on which someone has ejaculated several times, especially when multiple used, dried condoms are left lying on it. This is because oyster is used as slang for ejaculate and used condoms dry up and somewhat resemble oyster shells. An oyster bed will usually belong to a slob or a hogger, almost always male.

Also a term used by fishermen and others to describe areas of seafloor where several oysters (the creatures) reside in their shells.

Pat goes hogging in his bed all the time and doesn't change the sheets. Even worse, he leaves his jizz and dried rubbers in it. He sleeps in an oyster bed and it's disgusting.

by PMax April 22, 2010

Oystered

An act of oystering, specifically used in a negative connotation.

I popped a benzo, went to the bar, pissed on my friends couch, and was completely oystered.

by ayeitzkp December 2, 2019

Oystered

To "get oystered" is when you get ultimately rekt from peeking a spot or getting one tapped in csgo. Normally occurs when you don't listen to your top fragger.

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"Don't peek it Kru$h! *Kru$h peeks it ~ get's one tapped* Haha scrub! Get oystered!"

"Peek it you won't! *Kru$h shoulder peeks it ~ awper lands the shot and kills him* Damn. He just got oystered. Oh well, at least he dropped an awp."

by ClepClep November 7, 2018

double oystered

When your sick significant other drinks out of your drink, not once, but twice, leaving a slippery salty present inside your drink

I can’t believe she double oystered me to make sick too just so I can stay home with her.

by Fivetimesmike January 16, 2023

oystered

To be sneakily poked with a persons extended moist tongue.

While partaking in a netflix and chill sesh, my boyfriend oystered me.

by heiney89 February 15, 2017

Oysterberry

A hemorrhoid coated with a combination of fecal matter and semen.

Following his evening of Chipotle and anal sex, Frank needed baby wipes to clean off the oysterberry.

by Benjamin McFaggot December 8, 2018