Alternative name for a well-known chain of cheap sports shops in the UK that sells all of the brands usually spotted in paedophile sting videos such as Slazenger, Dunlop and Crocs. One of their employees was once stung in the stock room of a Nonces Direct shop and as a result is now considered king of the paedos.

After Jimmy the paedo had given out all of his sweets, he popped into Nonces Direct and bought a Slazenger jacket

nonces direct by Baz&Dave May 31, 2019

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Noncestick

When a paedophile has raped so many kids that the government has decided to impale them on a metal pole.

You hear about that paedophile Nik who lived up the road? Yeah now he is just a noncestick

Noncestick by NJRuler November 6, 2019

Ginger nonce

Stephen tries

Have you seen that ginger nonce new vid

Yeah Stephen tries

Ha gottem

Ginger nonce by SUB2PEWDIEPIE SUB2WILLNE March 16, 2019

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Dog Nonce

An individual who uses a dog for any of the following: 1) sexual contact, 2) fouling public places with faeces, 3) placing faeces where children play, 4) imposing their dog(s) onto members of the public, 4) causing noise nuisance.

Make sure your children play somewhere well away from paedophiles or dog nonces.

Dog Nonce by topwise September 4, 2019

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Nonce

British slang for pedophile

That guy in the van is a nonce

Nonce by Poo86 December 27, 2018

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Bunhead

A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.

"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."

Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014

Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

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trucker's tan

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.

I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.

trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006

Word of the Day on October 5, 2026

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kidulting

The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys

Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!

kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025

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Boffin

British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.

According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.

Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023

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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.

I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.

Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026

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